Either way, in agreeing to scoop a pan and fill a bowl, I had no idea I'd be facing an incredibly stressful biohazard.

It's very hard to judge with an unknown quantity, you're right. In this case, I'd say the fact that you were recovering from not-insignificant injuries could have given you an out even if the cats weren't "problem children". Maybe you can create an Inconvenience Scale to judge by - "right on my way home, not too many stairs, a pet I actually like", but if you catch yourself radically rearranging your schedule in your head, trying to figure out how to make it work, maybe it's too much.

And you're still a much nicer person than me, because I very much fear that as soon as I found out they KNEW the cat would do that, I would start leaving the 'gifts' where I found them and just walk carefully. But maybe I'm more of a bitch than you...

P.S. And even as big of a bitch as I may be, I made sure that we warned the neighbor who was keeping an eye on mine when I was out of town - that Ember would probably do that, that it wasn't a comment on her scooping skills, that it didn't mean that she's sick - and not to worry about the rug (an old throw rug that we've written off for this purpose) beyond getting rid of the pile.

P.P.S. I feel the need to clarify this is a litterbox in the garage - we don't have a poopy rug in the house!

Practical advice: Almost never a need to say "yes" to anything right away. Next time someone asks you to commit to something, say "let me get home and check my calendar". If you have even the slightest doubt run it by on the board, to get feedback. Even if you know you are going to say yes, maybe run it by so people can suggest conditions.

Oh, very practical, Typo! I especially like, "let me check my calendar" - completely reasonable, but gives you a metaphorical moment to step away and get a little perspective.

That is fantastic advice, Typo. And bonny, for what it's worth, I have to have external sanity checks on taking on obligations or saying yes to things asked of me.

Also: are these people who would do what they are asking of you, for you? Have they done it for others? Have they done anything ever for you? Of any magnitude similar to what they are asking?

One of my friends gets into the situation where people have her fix their computers. She is good at it, likes to do it , but it can eat her weekend. And a lot of people drop by 'desperate' . My suggestion was that she tell people that it might be awhile before she can look at the computer - a week ten day, etc, and that it will be longer to actually fix it.

Maybe with animals, it is simple - you just want to meet them first. the reason - to give you time to think of all the reasons you can 't do it. Too many other jobs, difficult pet, difficult commute, and it gives you time to remember all the right questions , where are the paper towels, what it the preferred liter , preferred foods, who is friendly , who will hide. ect.

I think even when helping people out in non -pet situations - you might want to think what are the reasons not to help some one. Not that you won't help but so you know why you might not want to . I have to go the other way sometimes. - remember the good reasons to do something...

Ever since K-Bug moved out her room has become the pilot room (pile it here, pile it there). Today I decided to tackle the mess and I have it sorted now, just need to put things away and I feel a migraine coming on. Not cool man. I still need to hit up the farmers market, go grocery shopping, and vacuum the rest of the house.

I could prob be ok skipping the farmers market and vacuuming but there is no food in the house.

I really wish I knew where this constant anxiety was coming from. It's probably not terribly healthy.

I kinda feel like the bridge from Peter Gabriel's "I Have The Touch":

Pull my chin, stroke my hair, scratch my nose, hug my knees
Try drink, food, cigarette, tension will not ease
I tap my fingers, fold my arms, breathe in deep, cross my legs
Shrug my shoulders, stretch my back - but nothing seems to please