Hmm, the OB/GYN conversation is (painfully) timely, because I'm having a recurrence of ridiculously painful cysts on my magical ladyparts (basically the area of the vulva referred to as the "vestibule," which I think is the funniest name ever).

I seem to get one every 6-9 months, and normally they're painful but subside within a week or so. Last time I saw my OB/GYN, I mentioned them, and she said if they last more than a couple of days, to call, and she'll "take care of them." (I hope it's not Cosa Nostra style.)

My perusing of Dr. Google in the past makes them sound like cysts of the Bartholin gland, but when I mentioned that to my doctor, she said they were probably just an ingrown hair or blocked sweat gland.

In any case, when they've recurred in the past, it's only been one that shows up. Now I have 2. And it's more than twice as painful, which is not fair. I mean, even twice as painful would suck mightily, but more than twice as painful is just mean. It hurts to walk. I almost took half a squirreled-away percocet because of how much it hurt earlier.

Fortunately, my doctor can see me tomorrow.

So, first I have a phone interview, and then something that might hurt a lot will happen to my magical ladyparts. I don't think it's going to be my best day ever.

Yes, exactly. I'm so pissed that my sister got someone who was so totally not that way.

Good grief. At least when I've been crying at the doctors it's either because I'm hella depressed or because some other health issue is makin me crazy. Not because of the doctor. Jeez.

Tep, the interview will be brilliant! I have no doubts.

when I mentioned that to my doctor, she said they were probably just an ingrown hair or blocked sweat gland.

That has happened to me. Once, I had to have it "taken care of," too. It was not in exciting Cosa Nostra style, though.

And they are the most painful kind of painful, I agree.

Jesus, I get them repeatedly. I mean only every 6-9 months (or maybe even closer to a year), but when they happen over and over again, it's just EVIL. And holy cow, TWO of them is like a curse has been cast upon me.

Tep, the interview will be brilliant! I have no doubts.

I'm actually pretty confident about my experience and skills, but where my confidence is shaky is in how AWKWARD I am when I talk to people I don't know. But I think I'll be okay.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA, job craziness update: if I sign the PIP, I can't move to another team. If I don't sign the PIP, we start the process for a 30 day paid job hunt internally. As I don't want to work for Umbridge anymore, guess what option I'm telling the HR minion tomorrow?

On the plus side, the HR director at Cheezburger has been directly emailed my résumé, because I have connections.

If I don't sign the PIP, we start the process for a 30 day paid job hunt internally.

It sounds like the other team wants you, though, right? That's promising. But what a frustrating, needless ball of shit.

On the plus side, the HR director at Cheezburger has been directly emailed my résumé, because I have connections.

ALSO promising!

OMG Jilli. It's a rock and a hard place all in one.

brenda,

forgive me for asking this, but is your sister goddess sized by chance? There have been studies that doctors mistreat larger patients routinely. It is fucking ridiculous.

Good god, Jilli. A curse upon her.

And holy cow, TWO of them is like a curse has been cast upon me.

It's twice the pain!

Have you tried frozen peas? In the bag, I mean. It can help.

Have you tried frozen peas? In the bag, I mean. It can help.

I didn't even think about that. I was trying a warm washcloth, but something frozen didn't even occur to me. Duh.