I really hate the term "fucktard". Maybe it is because of my line of work, but it's just beyond ugly. There is a lot of contempt packed into it, and while it is being directed at people who are behaving contemptibly, it also drags some other people into the contempt who do not deserve it.

Somehow group behavior seems to just amplify individual's bad behavior.

I think somehow some people figure they can hide behind it and not get called out, and even though you know there's backchannel it's really easy to ignore that it could ever be about you, and negative. Entitledness just needs silence to feed it, really.

I'd never invite them to anything again--it's easy for us to say that, because we don't know the good times, why you were friends with them in the first place, but it would be my reflex to not just avoid the unpleasant situation that you can't fix, but to just not be around them for causing a stupid and unpleasant situation in the first place. I'm harsh and unforgiving, though.

These are friends that came with the marriage. K has been friends with The Group since prehistoric times, his wife not as long, but longer than me. I invite them to stuff because ... they just get invited. Then again, it seems to be very prevalent in The Group to excuse bad behavior because , "Oh, that's just ______! He/She doesn't mean any harm!" Personally, I'm really fucking tired of it. It's one of the factors that makes Joe and me want to leave Michigan again.

Entitledness just needs silence to feed it, really.

Exactly, which leads to the phenomenon Aimee described.

My "Tribe" had a prominent member who was so ridiculously late to everything that people would lie to her about when events were supposed to start. They lied on the off chance that she might mistakenly NOT be hours late.

Everyone 'joked' about it, calling it K-time and rolling their eyes.

When I chose to confront her, it was shocking how quickly the folks who bitched behind her back disappeared.

In the end, the disrespect of wasting people's time boiled over into lots of other negative situations. It was sad.

Fuck me with a spoon if I don't hate people who didn't mean any harm (or anything by it). People who were just trying to help when they did something that messed you up, yes, I grit my teeth and bear it unless it does harm me.

But I try to be not "that's just ita !" and I want when I mean to do harm to look really different from when I don't. Just sayin'.

I know I fail--but I'm working on it, and I hope I'm improving.

Fuck me with a spoon if I don't hate people who didn't mean any harm (or anything by it).

Right?

Sometimes I get really mad at the "it's just his way!" people. Only thing is, I can't decide if it's cause the way they act is really beyond the pale, or if I'm just pissed that nobody issued me a similar, lifelong pass. ETA: Even people who do mean harm, don't generally cop to it.(In my experience, anyway)

I tried to post a joke from the movie theater, but auto-correct ruined it. So, here we go.

Don't touch Joey's food!

t /Friends

or if I'm just pissed that nobody issued me a similar, lifelong pass.

I have to cop to this one too.