Trader Joe's has (or used to have) pickle popcorn. (I don't know if they still have it because I don't care for dill pickles so I don't look for the popcorn.)

Hah. Canadians have been eating those forever. They didn't make it to the US until the Rise of the Hipsters.

Why is there so little info out there on what to do if your child is a bully? One of the people who lives at the house I manage is... well... treating one of her housemates in a bullying way, and doing some nasty things to one staff member in particular. It is always when I am not around. When I find out about incidents and talk to J about what she has done, she tells me "it was an accident, I didn't mean to". She is smart enough to sometimes come and tell me her side of something before I have a chance to read up on staff notes and see what really happened. There is not a lot I can do, even if she admitted to purposefully being nasty. There are some medical/hormonal changes going on - and I have been hoping that the doctors would get to the bottom of that, and get some medical intervention going on to improve this person's mood. But that will take months and the staff member who is getting targeted is losing patience with me.

I have had extensive training and experience in how to protect people from physical and verbal abusive behaviors while they are occurring, but it has never been my job before to tackle the mop-up operations after.

I have been trying to work with J on handling her emotions in ways that help her feel better without hurting others, but then when I am not there, things flare up again.

So I am trying to learn more about how stop bullying in the bully, and all I'm finding is "if your child is a bully, make sure they know bullying won't be tolerated." Well great. That helps so very little. I don't know what that even means. To me that implies a punishment/consequences scenario. Punishment is not a tool I have available. Our model of behavior management in the long term is that behavior is communication - when someone has challenging or aggressive behavior there is a reason, and if help them solve the problem, the behavior will get better.

Unfortunately it is likely that the people being bullied might be able to be helped more than the bully. Helping them with tools on handling the bully might help, and making them understand it is her sickness not anything they are doing. If a medical issue is causing the bad behavior it might take medical intervention, and that might take some time.

So basically there's nothing.

Edited to add: Laura, thank you for taking the time to think about possible solutions.

I'm having one of those "sick of my job" days. I'm a big picture person, and I am sick of having to mind other people's details. I'm sick of my own details. Blah blah blah Crabby crab crabcakes.

{{Andi}} I hope today is filled with sweet moments that remind you that you do make a real difference in peoples lives. (including Buffistas)

I'm sorry, WS. I hope today improves.

Tea:

We're having a play date today with vw and Stitch. ltc is very excited.

I want a playdate with Stitch and ltc.

Unsurprisingly my lack of extra meds led to a horrible night's sleep. What sleep I did get was nightmare fueled and I had to fight to wake myself up to look at something in the room that would prove that I wasn't trapped in the dream world. I don't see how tonight will be much improvement. I'm going to call my pharmacy to see if there is ANYTHING that can be done to get me even one day's dose of a couple of things.

For the record, day 3 of a mild-but-still-annoying migraine PLUS day 1 of your period is NOT a stellar combination. It's like the painkillers don't know where to go first.