Friend of mine loves her Tieks. I'm intrigued but leery; my feet are problematic, I hate to buy shoes I haven't tried on.

I hate to buy shoes I haven't tried on.

I just got two pairs of shoes from Amazon--can't decide if I want to keep both. One is a pair of chukka type boots, which are a little big, but are sold out in smaller size. I think they'd still work though? Need new shoelaces because the ones it came with are mint green?? The other pair are flat black booties. Decided I wanted some waterproof shoes that aren't heeled but also aren't knee high boots. But...not sure I love these? Decisions!!

Ugh, you guys, so scary tonight. One of the men in my improv class had brain cancer and had a tumor removed earlier this year. But then he started having seizures, which he's had trouble controlling. (Also, I'm not sure that the surgery to remove the tumor was able to remove *all* the cancer, and I'm not comfortable asking him, but he's been deteriorating pretty rapidly over the last 3-4 weeks.)

During the first class session back in August, he told us what his seizures are like, what the warning signs are that one is going to happen, what we should and should not do, etc. Which is all super useful for us to know. But he never had a seizure. Until tonight. It was after class ended, but before we all left. My back was turned, and the next thing I knew Roger was on the floor. (I still don't know if he fell -- I don't think so, because that's loud, and I didn't hear him fall. I think he recognized the warning signs and got down on the floor so that he wouldn't injure himself by falling.)

He can't drive any more, so a friend had driven him to class, and she stayed through the whole class, which was good, because she was clearly familiar with his seizures and asked him questions and kept him calm while it was happening.

It wasn't a grand mal seizure, and he could talk a little while it was happening. It didn't last more than 90 seconds, and he recovered well enough to be helped into a roll-y office chair so he could be pushed out to his friend's car (hey, a roll-y office chair is all we had, and thank god it was there).

I don't know him well. In fact, I barely know him. But he's a good guy. He's really kind and genuine and funny. And he's definitely deteriorating. Watching him decline is, in its own way, actually worse than the seizure was. But the seizure was scary, too. I wish there was something more that could be done for him, medically.

I love this class, but DAMN, 2016. Back off.

Oh, Steph. That's awful for him, and awful for everyone who has to watch, even from the periphery.

I'm sorry, Steph. hard all around

and thanks askye -- really between you and my DH I felt lie I didn't have to say anything - and with the stuff going down at work -I have to keep my mouth shut. nothing that is coming out is vaguely nice.

There's a chance he can get enrolled in a drug trial at Duke, but he won't know that for another week or so. I hope he gets in.

I know that life comes with no guarantees. I get that. But damn, this *is* awful. But he keeps coming to class, because why not? If he can still make it, he's gonna.

I had ten vials of blood drawn today for testing. That may actually be a new record for me. And fasting! I rewarded myself with an enormous plate lunch.

crunchy crunch granola:

Time for a pick-'em-up, my dears. Treat yourself to this glorious post, IF WOMEN WROTE MEN THE WAY MEN WRITE WOMEN:

There is a particular look about a teenage boy that lets you know what kind of man he'll be. A certain fullness of lips, a frank sensuality in his gaze. We all know what the word for that is, but it's not polite to use it until he's proven he's that kind of boy.

Andrew didn't mind that he never came when they had sex. Bianca would climb on top of him and ride his pubis, grinding her clit until she spasmed and fell on top of him, exhausted and mumbling about love. He liked the way it got him excited and sometimes, later he would take care of himself. He really just wanted to feel the power of her body on top of his, to know that he was exciting to her. Besides, what are orgasms when compared to true love?

so basically I want to read all of these novels.

Steph, It is heartbreaking to watch someone deteriorate. But this guy, he seems to have decided to keep living as good a life as he possibly can. That is a gift.

I'm glad you got your raise.

My good thing today was finding out for sure that the start date on the promotion is Nov. 1. But then I realized that tonight would be my last day working at the house I was at. Mostly I held it together fine, even when I made the announcement at dinner. But then later, helping one of the guys brush his teeth - I usually sing while he brushes. It takes me two minutes to sing "I Know an Old Woman Who Swallowed a Fly", which is way more fun than listening to a timer tick by. I kept choking up as I was singing because it suddenly hit me, last time I would be singing with him.