He is very stubborn, and I already had my hands full breaking him of attacking my mother(Over 2 years without an incident...I do rock as a play therapist!) but sometimes I had to pick my battles and whatnot.

I haven't seen or heard him for a while, which is kind of troubling, but I will try to hold out some hope for him. Nobody has ever needed me as much as that cat. My brother jokes that he would join Facebook just to be my fan and "Like" all my stuff(There's a voice...it's pretty funny, if kind of long on "Gay BFF" stereotypes)

Feeling SO bad about the times I wanted him to leave me alone. Now he is and it feels like shit.(I really do love the beast, but when my mother stopped trusting him, I think he got really dependent on me.)

I'm sorry erika

erika, it's hard when a cat (or a person) who has challenging behaviors wants/needs to monopolize your time. It is not your fault that this cat cut himself off from from other social contact. And you are not wrong or selfish for needing some cat-less moments. Sometimes I need to not snuggle Harvey. I feel guilty for holding Harvey at arm's length when I do. But claiming our own space and time to maintain our sanity has to be better than letting them drain our spirits until we are weary and angry.

I don't think I brushed him off too often...I like it that we're close. It just seems sad now(even though he can be demanding on occasion, or I know that I really had stuff to do. Or he really didn't need to guard the whole hallway to be happy,even though I read that cats think we are like them and can jump over things.) Right now I'm putting my scent on a blanket so I can "be at the vet with him" even though I can't be there.

erika it will probably be very soothing for the blanket to have your scent.

I slept in the same t shirt several nights in a row and put that in the carrier when we drove down to NC just so there was my scent in there. Don't know how much it helped.

The cats are getting along but I'm feeling guilty.

I found a storage cube and put it on the computer desk and she was spending a lot of time cozy inside it. And then I put flea medicine on her while she was in it. I knew it was a bad idea but I was sleepy and it seemed like a good idea.

And now she won't get in the cube and I'm trying to figure out how to make it feel safe again.

She's getting along mostly okay with Lovey. I took the calming collar off of her because her fur got matted from where it was wet with the flea medicine and rubbing against the collar and she's perked up and they've only gotten in one spat since then.

It's the same thing - Lovey wants to plaaaaay!! and Penny just isn't into it.

Got my NC drivers license today. Well the paper version.

Also my period, all I want to do is..be comfortable and be on my computer, which I can't because the chair I'm using sucks. I need to get an actual computer chair.

I don't think I'll be going to get E from school today and he'll be here all day tomorrow. I want to have fun with him but right now I also just want to take something and sleep for 2 days.

Hugs, erika

I'm sorry, erika. Losing a pet is hard.

It is, and I wasn't exactly feeling great about life for a bunch of reasons, anyway. Now, of course, it feels like they(almost, except for worrying about the climate or something) could be perfected if I could do the impossible and get my friend back.