That's a tough situation, askye. To some extent carrying on treating your mental health issues as ordinary medical issues will help set the tone for how others react to you. There are those who are bigoted or clueless, but fuck 'em. As much as it might feel otherwise, their problems are outside of you.
Typo, I agree with Trudy that it sure looks as though the goal is to corner you into engaging. In your shoes, I would consider how possible it is to connect with the husband exclusively (if so, either keep the money and thank him while utterly ignoring the very existence of the wife; or, return it using the method you have planned). I'm not sure how possible or probable that is. Can you carry off a convincing "Really? They left CASH on my doorstep? I had no idea. Just goes to show what kind of world we live in nowadays"? If so, either keep it without acknowlegding the money you "found" could be theirs, or donate it somewhere.
I have a Harvey snuggled up in the crook of my arm. Dunno if we have five more good days or five more good years. All I know is this moment is a blessing. I've been rehearsing a short speech about "I miss him a lot but love never dies" so I have it ready to recite without breaking because the time is going to come when the people I work with ask how the kitties are doing and the answer won't be "wonderful".
Connie, I wholeheartedly support pitching as much holiday tradition out the window as you please for the "first" Christmas. Make new traditions. There will be time to blend new with old later.
Shir, I love seeing your font.
I'd keep the card as damages for her being a wretched bitch, and write a thank-you note to the husband.
You need the money. It's food. She's stupid. Accepting it puts no onus on you to change your feelings or behavior toward her, so don't cut your nose off to spite your face.
You could buy some stuff that food banks usually don't get, but need, like spices, etc (there's lists of stuff like this on the internet) with half of it, and then get some food, which you NEED, for yourself.
I think you are right. I will accept the cash (not any kind of card) and give her husband a thank you card.
Going back a way, it confounds me how many people are truly clueless or just so mired in their own perceptions of how things work in regard to religion. There's the "war on Christmas" deal which seems to be a mindset of all-Christmas-all-the-time or it's being shut out, rather than seeing it as an opening up to other traditions. And there was a fuss because a local school district was asked to include Muslim holidays on the calendar ... when they fell on the same days as some Jewish holidays which were already on the calendar (as well as the Christian ones). Their response was to take out ALL mention of religion on the calendar ... although - coincidentally! - the holidays are falling on Christmas and Easter and so on.
Bonus cluelessness: the politician at an event marking the beginning of Hanukkah said, "Jesus is the reason for the season."
My gast is truly flabbered.
And here I got the impression yesterday that Axial Tilt is the reason for the season. Whatever the reason, glad tidings and good cheer to all!
Plus, there's Mithras, whose mother was a virgin and who was born in a cave at the winter solstice.
The realtor scheduled at noon a showing at 330. I did not know that we were having showings yet, & I have an appointment at 430 that I have to be at, we all need to be out of the house for an hour at 330, and we have one freaking car. Thank God that the house is mostly tidy, however my pleasant day with my stepson is now turned into a straightening up and dusting and tidying frenzy. I'm really appreciative right now.
In support of Connie's comment...more about Mithras via QI.
My favorite line, "Is he a tribute band?"
There is a response to the War on "The Holidays" in the comments of this Slacktivist blog post which is so brilliant that I'm tempted to plaigairize it. At the moment it is near the end of the thread, (though, these people are talky, talky people so who knows where it will end up in the long run), author's name is "Mister Hush" and it starts out "*Bane Voice*" [link] You won't be sorry if you read it. Unless you have something in your mouth while you read it.
So, we had Christmas plans to go to the movies and get Chinese food. But then my sister said she didn't want to go to the vegan Chinese restaurant like we'd planned, because it wasn't festive enough, and she suggested a different restaurant. I said I didn't want to go there, because they've got a wall of fish tanks, and I don't like watching fish swimming while people are eating fish. And somehow, this now means that we're not going out at all, and instead, we're staying in and my sister is making lasagna, which I can't eat. And she seemed insulted when I asked what she was making for me, since she's the one who decided we're staying in.
