If the person is in ICU, I'm pretty sure they prefer visits to be family only, though it's hard to check for that. They definitely prefer the number of visitors is low.

I thought so, too! (My caps lock was on when I started typing that, so I looked really emphatic!) Yes, I'm not close to these people, so it doesn't feel appropriate to visit at a really vulnerable time, but I have a little experience with the ICU (thanks, Dad), and I was pretty sure visitors were really restricted.

Sounds like the "friend" is very ignorable.

I am so over her shit. She's very judgmental and inflexible. Obviously.

Also, if I'm ever in the ICU, you guys are all welcome to visit me (but it's not a requirement as proof of our friendship). But don't make a special trip or anything. We can Skype.

I don't visit people I don't know well in the hospital. I might send a card if I thought it wouldn't be weird. I'm not the sort of person who can sit down beside an ill/injured person and gabble brightly and cheer them up. I never know what to say to people who are hurting, mainly because I can't force platitudes and dishonest words of hope out of my mouth. My visits are awkward and I can't stay long, and I don't think my discomfort helps them any. I guess there's a reason I don't have many friends.

When I was in the hospital, I wanted people to care, but not necessarily to come visit. I felt vulnerable and exhausted and I wanted to be left alone even more than usual. I was scared, but no one was going to be able to help me with that.

And see, if what FB lady thought was that people should be given privacy when they're in ICU, and "friends" dared to visit, she'd be all up in people's shit about that. MAYBE STOP JUDGING OH MY GOD. You don't get to go to everyone's wedding. Not everyone is friends in the same way. Not everyone expresses friendship in the same way. That's all okay.

Okay, I have to take the dog to the vet. He says you can all visit him, if you bring T-R-E-A-T-S. If you don't bring T-R-E-A-T-S, then stay your asses home, foul humans.

Um, no. If someone is in the ICU I assume only family and maybe bestest of friend. Maybe.

Otherwise, I don't think I have any friends who have been hospitalized long enough that visitors are a thing, honestly. I mean, yes, if I was in the hospital for weeks, visitors would be awesome. But if I were just there a couple of days? Only whoever I needed to make sure I was getting the right care and has anything I need like pajamas or snacks or books or whatever??

A post saying "Stoke Patient would love visitors - please feel welcome to come by" would be so much more productive.

Agreed. A card or email is nice. Depending on the situation, maybe some flowers. Visitors should be family, close friends, a representative from any organization that the patient is involved with.

do people visit acquaintances in the hospital?

Absolutely not! Especially in the ICU. In ICU they really only want immediate family. I'm sure they would rather not have a bunch of people dragging their germs in around the gravely ill people.

When I was in the hospital DH didn't even want his siblings to visit me and didn't allow people in ICU at all, except my kids. He let my best friend and the other immediate family after I was in a regular room, but only for a short time. I have no memory of any of my hospital time. He told me that he made the decision that I would not want people to come see me when I looked like death and was pretty much out of it. Good call dear.

And the notion of people that aren't very very close visiting is just not right. After they are out of ICU and in recovery or rehab and need a bit of cheering, sure if the family or patient say it is okay, but not just showing up.

As close as I feel to you guys I still would check with your family before showing up to visit you in the hospital.

When H was in isolation for his burns, there were a couple of extremely persistent coworkers, one of whom was rubbernecking *past* me, where I stood physically blocking the door and pointing to the "isolation" sign. I wanted to pound her.

And when I was in for surgery, one of the things I remember most vividly from that 24 hours of sick post-op morphine haze was him refusing to admit the interim pastor from my mom's church and a couple of deacons who wanted to come in and pray over me. I was far from presentable, and even if I had been, you know, bathed, and lucid, those were not the people I wanted around me when I was hurting and incapable of civility. I loved him for being a watchdragon at the door.