I keep thinking I should be worrying about how "well" I'm coping. I keep telling myself that it's unique to everyone, but I'm worrying that I'm only delaying some breakdown in the future. Then I think of the next 20 years of everything we'll miss together, and that breakdown isn't very future any more.
I'm not sure if the longview is your friend right now. There's so much to process emotionally, especially early on that I think it helps to just focus on the day and coping mechanisms and things like that.
Whatever gets you through the night is all right. Whatever works. Personally (and I know I'm not alone in this) but doing something physical was the best way to process my grief. If the idea of exercise is torture then walking outside might be enough. The thing though is that you don't want to just be spinning in your head and sinking in your heart. You can divert yourself by doing something physical and that gives you some relief.
But really, I'd recommend that you look for nothing but coping strategies right now. Because this is still the hardest part and you need to support yourself as best you can.
If you run out of Castle, then some comfort reading like Terry Pratchett perhaps. Doing something with your hands. Try to think of something that won't have you staring up at the ceiling in the dark.
I wonder who installed those Puritans in my head, who twit me for not grieving "correctly." The mindgames that get me through the day are not a copout, I don't have to keep poking my fingers in the wound. It's barely been four days.
That wound is going to be raw for a while. Still very fresh. The right way to grieve is take care of yourself and let your body and heart and head sort through it at its own pace. Don't push yourself. The opposite. Pamper yourself as best you can. This is hard.
Being strong doesn't keep you from feeling the loss. You go through it, and you do that at your own pace.