Just think how pissed we'd be at someone for effectively leading smonster on, if really they were...not feeling a relationship and hadn't been from the start--no mark against her, it's just who they are. This is important to her, and I think she should have all the information up front to make relationship decisions. If she wants to take the gamble, fine. But at least she knows she's gambling, and has a better idea of the odds.

I agree completely. It just seems a whole lot of people I know in long term relationships weren't looking for that to happen at the beginning.

It just seems a whole lot of people I know in long term relationships weren't looking for that to happen at the beginning.

But I bet the number of people not in long term relationships and aren't looking for it is even bigger. The exceptions are more memorable than entire lifestyles. I've probably said "no" enough times to make up for every exception listed here so far, and then some.

I remember having this conversation before when discussing St. W and I feel weird having it again. I don't know how else to describe my flinching, but I'm pretty sure I'm standing in ita's corner. I don't know how helpful it is to give wonderful examples of how we found our wonderful soulmates because.... of.... reasons? Note: I am much more guilty of this in many, many in-person conversations than anyone else (I am assuming) so I don't want to sound judgy and attacking, because that's so not what I'm meaning to do.

I just feel very uncomfortable providing anything that looks like false hope with what I know are the best of intentions.

Ugh, I'm not saying this right.

I understand, Nora. You're not being judgy.

Nora - let's say someone was noodling on a trip to NO sometime around mid-September. There's a really good deal right now for the French Quarter Wyndham. ($169 for two nights.) Is that a reasonablish place to stay or should I wait to see what else might come along?

Link in case anyone else is interested: [link]

Thanks, Laura. Both you and Scrappy are so awesome with the clearly awesome soulmates, and I didn't want to come across wrong.

I am perhaps beings touch ridiculously protective of the not-needing-my-protection smonster.

Yes, that's a good deal for a good hotel.

YAY PEOPLE VISITING NEW ORLEANS IN MID-SEPTEMBER!!

Oh, man--sorry, smonster if I was treating you like a delicate ickle flower--I was using your name as an example with whom we are emotionally invested, that's all. I got your back if you need it, but I know you got dibs on calling your own shots (or your own zipless fucks or lobster-hunting, whichever).

Hello Bitches! I'm coming up for air after being BURIED in work (we're getting a new website up and running) and a long-term bad reaction to a vaccination.

Trying to catch up ....