And...one on one is had. I didn't get a particularly good review for last year, despite bringing in two major projects--I can deliver, she said, but the middle bits are messy.
I told her I wouldn't have rated myself either, because I've been highly frustrated in my inability to please our users. I've been jumping over steps because we don't have the right manpower to take them. And I've been leaning on resources outside our department, which infuriates my boss, because he's on the line for other people's work, but I WANT SOME RESULTS. I want stuff done. I want to fix and enhance and turn in solutions that make me want to fist pump.
I explained that I felt like I was making excuses for IT to the business, and vice versa, instead of representing. And now that the business has clear goals about excelling, and our goals seem to be about bracing the apple cart...
I also explained that the primary developer that I'm working with can't fill the hole her predecessors left (INCOMPETENT), and I can't work out how to accommodate that, but she wants instructions, and my job is requirements not instructions, and she can't tell the difference (INCOMPETENT) (and in fact is panicked by the freedom to make decisions (INCOMPETENT)). And, finally, my manager agreed.
I'd rather have had a glowing eval, but she left saying she had a lot to think about, and she left saying she doesn't doubt my zeal to produce, so that's the most important stuff taken care of.
And I left determined to work this fucking system until it begs me for mercy.
Right. Timesheets for March...