what? LUNGS??

In sweeter news: Puffin cam!

ripping people's lungs out isn't ita !'s style, is it?

Good god, no. I could get fluids on my clothes.

That OKCEnemies tumblr is making me actually look at profiles on OKC. Which is not good, because I'm not actually going to date any of them. Unless one of them turns out to be the kid I had a crush on when I was 9, no, it's just not worth it. I'm too lazy.

In the midst of trying to work out how to find people who are bad matches, I clicked on one because he had an excellent profile pic. But if you list 145 bands/musicians and your food section is "it all tastes like chicken to me"...there's no way we can make it past our differences. Sorry. You and your cheekbones people ask to touch in public are just not fated to be with me. I'm so sad.

Oh, shit. This never ends well. The bit where I read my mail, I mean.

Are you bipolar or do you have any of the other mental disorders? I am not contacting you just because I want sex, I can get some sex right now if that was the case and I am not writing(typing) you because I think that you are the most beautiful woman that I met on this website. I have written quite a few messages but I have not met any of the women, yet. You have a certain look about yourself that does fascinate me somewhat and the ideal that you're thin; together they make me want to see what you are really like with me....smile I am not here because I am desperate to get married either, I want to take my time and get to know a woman better before I take here to the altar, but if you're not at least good in bed with me there will definitely be no us forever(maybe until someone better comes to my rescue...ha! ha! .... P.S. Just keeping things real with you; that's all this is honey..

Let me get back to work now...

I have written quite a few messages but I have not met any of the women, yet.

I think I might know why, honey.

Speaking of bad dates...

Comment Of The Day: Libertarian Sexts Edition

Accounts of a date with a libertarian.

I'm sure most libertarians are nowhere near this creepy.

(It's a graphic so I can't cut and paste.)

Dress made from boozy bacteria is groovy (and a little bit gross)

It's great to be on the cutting edge of fashion, right? Would you change your mind if the cutting edge meant you'd be wearing a dress or a shirt made from the same bacteria that helps ferment your favorite beer or wine? Quite possibly you'll be both repulsed and fascinated by this all-organic, fermented fabric.

Researchers at the University of Western Australia have created Micro'be' Fermented Fashion as a result of working on the process of taking Acetobacter — the bacteria that ferments wine into vinegar — and and turning it into a "living" fabric. The by-product of fermenting a large colony of this bacteria, is the formation of micro-fibers or cellulose which are synonymous with plant based cottons.

The little red dress seen here is grown with red wine as part of the fermentation process, and didn't require a single stitch when being made. It reportedly feels like "sludge" when wet and acts like a second skin. When dry, it takes on more of a fabric feel, and apparently smells like red wine.

Lungs found on Los Angeles sidewalk

That's a bad splinch.

editing, formatting, and combining powerpoint presentations all day long.

also, woke up with muscle spasms in my back.

not a day of win, but I am trying not be a complete ogre.

Oh, shit. This never ends well. The bit where I read my mail, I mean.

Wow. That person sure is special. Oh, I meant to share my latest here -- the teaser email ended with "and now I have a big warm...." which he did complete with "problem. :)" OK then.

I didn't even know Conan O'Brian is filming in Chicago this week.

Here's what he did yesterday:

10-Foot Bratwurst Jumps 80 Feet Across Chicago's State Street Bridge @ TeamCoco.com

Conan attempts to launch a 10 foot bratwurst across a drawbridge, for no good reason at all.

eta: A video.