Every time I fake a sick day, I get sick for real as soon as I come back to work.

Me too! It is really annoying. It is possibly because I fake sick, it is because I feel a little off, but am not really sick. It is probably the beginning of the sickness.

So men who are trying to explain why they explain things are being dismissed as part of the problem? How are they supposed to respond to these kinds of things then? Obediently say "Yes, dear, you are, of course, right"?

Every time I fake a sick day, I get sick for real as soon as I come back to work.

Me too! The worst.

So men who are trying to explain why they explain things are being dismissed as part of the problem? How are they supposed to respond to these kinds of things then? Obediently say "Yes, dear, you are, of course, right"?

Some of them, sure. If your explaination is that "I have a really hard time not chiming in when I think I know about something"*, well, I have that problem too. If your explanation is that "this problem of mansplaining is not really real because I have very good reasons to explain, and anyway women do it too, and also men do it to men, and so I can't credit your own observations based on your lived experience" then yes, STFU.

*Even better if it's combined with "I don't think I do it more to women than men, but maybe going forward I'll try to see if there's a pattern there or not"

clearly then I really am getting sick and need to be home.

just compared the school calendar to the work holiday calendar and submitted for a couple of days in Nov and Dec to cover some of the gap.

I think I need to reach out to a couple of other parents and see if we can swap child-watching for some of the school closed days, otherwise I will run out of vacation.

So men who are trying to explain why they explain things are being dismissed as part of the problem?

I don't think the problem is just explaining, in a general sense of "If you light the grill that way, it will explode."

I thought mansplaining was when men tried to explain women's own lived experiences to them (the women, that is). Not just "You aren't grilling the steak right; let me show you." (Although that could be annoying, sure.) But more, "You think rape is such a big problem? Try living with the constant threat of being falsely accused of rape just hanging over your head! You don't even KNOW how hard that is!!1!"

Or am I misunderstanding mansplaining?

And, "You aren't grilling the steak right; let me show you," when said to a professional grill cook. Say.

'suela, out of curiosity, does your father have medical power of attorney for your mom or do you or your sister?

It goes to my dad first, then my brother the doctor (if he's available), then my sister and I. So, yeah.

So men who are trying to explain why they explain things are being dismissed as part of the problem? How are they supposed to respond to these kinds of things then? Obediently say "Yes, dear, you are, of course, right"?

I think you may not be getting what "mansplaining" is. It's when a woman describes her own experience or expertise and a man explains it to her, entirely negating, ignoring, and talking over her. It's as if I met an accountant at a party, told him what I did, and had him lecture me for an hour on, say, federal environmental policy.

That's mansplaining. It's particularly offensive when exercised on women talking about sexism. Or, for instance, rape.

Or am I misunderstanding mansplaining?

Hopefully some guy will be able to lay it out for you, Steph.

No, although it's often more subtle than that.

"Catcalling on the street is not that big a deal - it doesn't happen that often, and anyway you should be flattered, not threatened."