Timelies all!

Happy Birthday juliana!

Happy Belated Birthday Zenkitty and Ouise!

So, grams is ready for a live at home nurse or assisted living, keeps hitting the button for the ambulance, an uncle who live 45 minutes away but wants nothing to do with her(unless it's her money), and my dad, who does, and who drives six hours one way when she hits that buttong, which has been three times in the past month. She's 92.

Oh, and I hate her. In an abstract way. We didn't part well the last time I saw her, but she's pretty self-centered enough that I'm sure she'd overlook it to focus more on her own needs. Which, at this point, with the fainting at grocery stores due to dehydration, are plenty.

Still, I'm toying with the idea of telling my dad that if something comes up, that I can drive the two hours from NJ to East Meadow to deal with her and whatnot until they get the assisted living business sorted out.

If I offered this, it would be for my dad, most definitely, who's a jerk but I do actually love him. Gramms couldn't die soon enough. In an abstract way, natch.

But I don't know if I can commit that time to a woman I've cut out of my life for the past decade.

Julie, maybe I'm not understanding, but I don't get why your dad has to drive 6 hours when she hits the button for the ambulance. When you say she "keeps hitting the button", I hear, there's nothing really wrong, she's just freaking like old folks do sometimes. (Is this a LifeAlert thing?) Surely the ambulance gets to her quicker than your dad can! If there's something actually wrong that your dad (or someone) needs to come, wouldn't the hospital call?

What the hell is wrong with people? [link]

I mean, seriously. What the hell?

Yeah, the hospital calls after the ambulance gets her to the hospital. They called my uncle, who replied that my dad dealth with her, and hung up on them. And then my dad would come down and talk to the doctors and get her out of the hospital and was her bedding and other laundry and get groceries. She apparently busted her tailbone and there's nothing the docs can do but give her pain meds, but every time the pain gets too much, she bangs for the ambulance, even if she has a relevant doctors appointment the next day.

She's fainted twice due to dehydration, so not taking care of herself. The washer and dryer are in the basement, and she's not been going down there. The house hasn't been vacuumed or dusted in months. The tell for me is that my dad has no sense of smell and even he claims that the house is stinky.

I don't know all the deets of why my dad has to go down every time, other than her medicare running out if the hospital decides to keep her longer when they have no idea why she's there or have no means to aid her. Even getting her into a rehab for her tailbone will take time.

But, if she pulls something again, where my dad feels that he has to come down to intervene, should I offer myself to go over, where I'd have a 3 hour roundtrip, as opposed to a twelve hour round trip.

Okay, I see. If I were you, I'd offer to go, because filial duty blahblah obligation guiltcakes. As you said, not for her, but for your dad. And encourage him to get her in a safe place asap. Not a good situation. Good ~ma to both of you!

What the hell is wrong with people?

Whoa. Although the gift card and the date aren't a bad ending, but seriously, a concussion? Wow.

I mean, I guess the woman was drunk or something, but WTF.

Would volunteering to take some of the load slow down the process getting her into a nursing home? Cause you were the one who said that even though you love him, your Dad is a jerk. Is he the kind of jerk who might respond that way?

Also for people who want to decide which facebook posts they see rather than let facebook decide - use Social Fixer!

What the hell is wrong with people?

In that case, I'd say what's wrong is, she forgot to take her meds. Ever.

Damn, if a bookstore isn't safe, where can you go?