I got it once I read her article -- I think her emphasis was to create a moment they could laugh about, and something to prove that no matter what they said to each in the heat of the moment, it wouldn't change the foundation of their relationship.

Sort of like telling a younger kid, "I don't like the way you behaved just now, but I'll always love you."

it's a cake that says "I hate you" on it! That's hilarious!

If you can think it's hilarious and I think it's oscillating between inexplicable and kind of embarrassing, I'm going to assume she could to totally serious.

"I don't like the way you behaved just now, but I'll always love you."

I explicitly asked my parents not to do this. Like, only love me if I act right. If I stop acting right--stop loving me.

It was...a conversation.

Amy, I read it the same way. I also liked the idea of commemorating the moment as a rite of passage. Most teenagers at least think they hate their parents at some point, even if they don't say it out loud, and I thought the cake was meant to say, "Hey, this is a normal part of growing up, and it doesn't actually mean we love each other any less."

If I stop acting right--stop loving me.

For definitions of what, drowning kittens? My kid has a pouty day or runs in the house and breaks something, I don't love them less even if I'm mad for a few minutes.

If we all love you unconditionally en masse, will your head explode?

ETA: Exactly, Kate. I mean, still not something I would probably do, but I had my first "I hate you" from Jake when he was five, so.

I, too, think it is hilarious! And I am thinking that the mom perhaps had a mom like mine, who has not forgiven me for saying that, or for not mourning our dog properly when I was 8, for example.

I started from serial murder and worked my way back to more legal behaviours *I* don't like in anyone including myself.

I'm actually very attached to the idea of people liking me for, you know, reasons. Or, well, disliking me for reasons, I guess.

Parents and children are a little different, though. Most parents tend to love their kids no matter what, even when they don't like them much.

Still not a fan, really. I think I'd rather be a worthless sack of shit whose mother hated her than one whose mother didn't. It's part of my world view.

Also, not breeding.

So I have been off today, and it's the first nice warm day we've had in a while. However, I am as cranky as fuck. (I'm pretty sure I am pms-ing.) For supper, I was planning to make garlic scape pesto and salad, which the greens and the scapes coming from my garden. You know, and green and healthy and delicious and homegrown.

But all I really want? McDonald's