I have to admit, I do encourage friends and family that are travelling to get foreign nookie. But that's because I've liked the overseas ass I've gotten very much, as opposed to thinking there's some righteous value to being paired off.

There's a big difference between meet a guy and bring him back, and meet a guy and leave him there!

Relatedly, I was randomly wondering about a guy I hooked up with in college who (last I heard) was in Chicago and divorced from his college girlfriend, since I'm going to Chicago, but I just heard he's apparently married again. Ah well!

I liked the article in the Atlantic, but I did kind of think the writer is a dork. (Not that that is anything I can hold against anybody.) I'm beginning to think there is no available person who is right for me, and I'm starting to think other people think that too, because the examples I get now are like Emily Dickinson, Jane Austen, and (naturally!) Helen Keller. Accomplished women, all, but seemingly not sexually fulfilled. sigh.

and it got us to the place where we *could* be right for each other.

Timing, as they say, is everything. I *wish* I had met Tim in our 20s because I want as much time as possible with him. (I met him at 35, and I don't think 50 years is an unreasonable expectation, damn it [but I also tell the dog he has to stick around for 50 years -- it's going to be a long haul with those 2 stinky old guys]), but I wasn't remotely ready for a healthy relationship until I was in my mid-30s. I did a lot of work in therapy on the whole issue of don't-be-with-someone-who-wants-you-to-change. A LOT. And then I met him.

Also, if I had met him earlier, he would have been already married, and that would have sucked. For me. So while I don't believe in fate, I do think that our timing was excellent.

I was single for a long time but I wasn't really in any shape to date since I was still in my "rebuilding" period (after being diagnosed w/bipolar disorder) and for awhile before that I made some really bad choices.

We've had our struggles but he's really supportive and understanding and the first time we met in person it didn't feel like a first F2F meeting, it felt like coming home, or a reunion.

I didn't meet D until after I was pretty much figuring I wasn't going to meet anyone and was cool with that. I was bored after surgery and putzing around all over the internets while off work recuperating, and I checked my OK Cupid account, and sent a random message to this guy who showed up on my recommended matches thingie.

The funny thing is (which I didn't discover until after we'd been dating for a couple of months) is that we knew a lot of the same people - his ex BiL was my co-worker at the time, and my best girlfriend's had met him and his ex-wife before. Small world. I didn't find this out until I introduced them at a party.

People are still completely flabbergasted I got married. My parents, my sister, my friends -- hell, I am. Poor D didn't believe me, but he's starting to..."Wow, people really are shocked!" Um. Yeah. I think it's because I'm so independent and bull-headed. But living with D is pretty easy -- we're very alike in so many ways, but wildly unalike in an equal amount of ways -- I'm a planner and very assertive, and he's not a planner, and not aggressive. I am the ass-kicker and the organizer in the family.

But it's excellent, because we're both hermits a lot and like a lot of the same things -- we putter around the house in our own orbits, and our orbits meet up, part, meet up. It's perfect. If I were with someone who wouldn't LEAVE ME ALONE for long stretches of time, I would bite his head off, like unto the preying mantis.

But D's head is safe.

I'm going to be traveling with my mom, so foreign nookie is off the table. Unless she gets some--she told me about her first trip to Europe, how she was constantly getting hit on all throughout Austria and Germany.

ETA: And I just realized that she was my age (45) when she went on that trip.

In other words: Suck it up and be The Village.

Ha! Important advice, and I say this as one of the people with no kids.

ION, it looks like I am NOT interviewing The Damned today, as the drummer has not responded to email, texts, or voicemail. Woe. Woe is the Goth.

Despite only knowing Monica for 3 months, I feel fairly confident this is going to work out. Maybe it's because we're both INFP, but we get along very well. We're both very laid back. Plus we have similar geeky interests.

Kathy, IIRC, several Buffistas have skulked their way to foreign nookie while traveling with parents. IJS.

Jilli, it's early. Perhaps they are still sleeping?