In what way, Allyson?

meara, [link]

I liked the article because it helped me dispel some of my (own) myths about coupledom and marriedom. And to me, that was very helpful. I really need to get out of the "why won't anyone ever marry me" mindset. It's not healthy and it's getting in my way. Dating someone seriously for four years, again with it ending the way it did really hurt me. A year ago I was convinced that I was going to Paris at Thanksgiving to finally be proposed to. Everything pointed to it. It took me 6 months of denial and then acceptance to to finally stop being angry about it. Actually, my twinset of surgeries in the Spring in a bizarre way helped me get over the anger and disappointment. Never thought I'd be happy to have surgery, but there you have it. It gave me something else to obsess about right when I needed it.

I refuse to consider someone/thing whose ass I have had to wipe for 5 years and counting a luxury item!

I need this on a t-shirt.

I need this on a t-shirt.

God, me too. Especially since they're not something you can resell, mortgage, or junk.

I think raising kids is a privilege in many ways, not least because it's a whole human being you're responsible for training to be a decent member of society.

Of course, the flip side of that is that it can be really easy to make a kid, wanted or not, and not everybody who's raising them takes the job seriously, or seriously enough.

I think flea's friend's argument is still ridiculous, though. There are huge trade-offs on both sides. She's completely devaluing her own time, her relative freedom, and a million other things that come with not raising children, and a tax break doesn't even come close to that, in my mind.

Edited for grammar.

I keep meaning to read that Atlantic article, and then not having the bandwidth to click past the first page.

I sometimes have that irritated feeling after spending more money on another baby gift or wedding shower that I need to throw a "not getting married or having children shower" and have everyone bring me presents just for being me.

My aunts wanted a shower when they bought their house, for this very reason -- not a housewarming, a SHOWER. So they got a shower. And then a couple of years later, they got married!

In what way, Allyson?

I think it stumbled into some evo psychy sort of rationales that tweak me, and that relationships are navigated like a tenuous peace accord between warring factions.

Being single does make me feel a bit unwanted/unattractive/unworthy of love. I think Kat once told me I could just lower my standards. But why date someone I think isn't as awesome as I am?

It hurts a little bit, but I don't think anyone who matters to me thinks I'm unworthy/unwanted/unattractive. They just think I need to get the fuck out of the house, more.

tommyrot! I was just wondering about you. What's up?

tommyrot! I was just wondering about you. What's up?

Not too much. Been working closely with my boss the last few weeks, so no opportunity to visit b.org during work.

Also, have been counting down the days until Nov. 17th, when I take an Amtrak train overnight (in a sleeper car) to Jackson, MS where I'll grab a rental car and drive to Tuscaloosa to visit Monica (my gf) for the weekend. She's just been damn busy at school, so this will only be the second time I see her. (She's coming to Chicago in early January for a week.)

ION, here is something ita ! might have posted: A Freakishly Bizarre Music Video About People With An Extra Head

In this freakishly bizarre music video for “Big Bad Wolf” by DJ duo Duck Sauce, we follow the tale of two men whose libido’s are embodied by second heads protruding from their crotches. The men (and their second heads) go about their day and then prepare for a night on the town, where they meet some women, and well, you’ve been warned.

I would argue this is technically work-safe, but....

I sometimes have that irritated feeling after spending more money on another baby gift or wedding shower that I need to throw a "not getting married or having children shower" and have everyone bring me presents just for being me.

I really want to be Tim's *wife* (I couldn't care less about a wedding, for reals), but I have to admit that part of me wants to get married to get new stuff that matches. Plates that match! And don't have cracks up the middle! Towels without stains of dubious origin! An espresso machine that blow-dries my hair!

...that last one exists, right? I assume it's one of those things only married people are allowed to have.

t edit And it *is* weird, living with him for 4 years but not being married. It's not-quite-societally-sanctioned relationshipness. Not really. Not as much as a spouse is.

Monica (my gf)

Hey! So, when did GF/BF status become official? Did I miss it? Woo!

Wait, I'm supposed to have clean towels? I'm doing this marriage thing all wrong.