Oh, and HI DEENA!!! It's so nice to have you pop in now and again, and I'm so glad you're feeling a bit better.

Have fun at the concert tonight! It sounds like a good day.

Thanks, guys! I'm listening to Christmas music on Pandora. Greg's home until noon, but he's napping. It will be my turn when he gets up.

Oh, Kara....I hope the 1/2 size one works well for her! I always wanted to learn to play the cello. Have a great time at the concert!

why didn't you ask her out before? You've been crushing on her for 20 months? Why not ask her out 18 months ago?

Because I don't ask girls out? Because she's in my theatre crowd and I see her all the time and I didn't want things to be awkward if/when she said no? Because everything is marriage marriage white devils so I had to evaluate how much I liked her and if it was worth it? Because my default assumption is that women don't like me and I am bothering them? I've basically given up at this point.

(I'm going to be busy all day, so if I don't respond, it's not a flounce.)

Because my default assumption is that women don't like me and I am bothering them?

I think this is where you might need to adjust your thinking. If you don't try, I can guarantee it won't happen. If you try, the possibility is always there. The possibility for getting hurt or rejected is also there. So, you need to ask yourself, would you rather for sure not have a girlfriend and not risk getting hurt or take the chance of having a girlfriend and accept the risks that come with it. Honestly, either answer is fine. It's just determining what you want and what you're willing to risk or give up.

Oh Laura, I'm sorry to hear that the path to adulthood has been such a slog for him, but your ability to mother him without smothering him is inspiring.

He just doesn't get it and totally spins all his failures as other people's issues.

Ugh that's a hard one. I have a few family members who do that and it's so frustrating to watch. It's not even the being wrong part that upsets me, it's the fact that without taking personal responsibility for their own choices and actions, there's no way to change what they've been doing and get to a place that makes them happier.

t points upward to ChiKat

Yeah, I've been single all my life and don't know another way to live, so I'm sure there's an amount of self-sabotage going on. This conversation has unexpectedly opened up a hole in my chest, so I think I'll just crawl into it and die. By which I mean I have an offsite today and need to not have this on my mind all day.

This conversation has unexpectedly opened up a hole in my chest, so I think I'll just crawl into it and die.

I snort laughed in empathy. Sometimes it just takes a little poke where we're very vulnerable to cause a whole lot of pain. See re: me and StW.