Connie, how did he discover that?

I don't remember why he decided to get his hearing tested (he has so many tests I've lost track) but we went to a specialized testing room with no echoes to test how his ears worked, and that came up nearly perfect while they had electrodes checking his brain. The numbers didn't line up. There is some physical damage due to a few busted ear drums frm when he was a fireman, but the primary problem is processing. They're not sure if it's damage, genetic, or a side effect of the ridiculous amount of drugs he's taken over the years.

Suzi and Windsparrow are me.

Dang. I didn't ever stop to think it was related to his ADD, and he hasn't said anything (normally he'll tell me if something is hindered by his ADD, for example, if I try to tell him something while the TV is on, he cannot concentrate on me, even if the TV only has commercials blaring, so he'll ask me to mute the TV).

I usually try to say, "Sorry, I didn't catch the first part of what you just said, could you please repeat it." I have also encouraged him to ask me to stop and listen to him before he gets into the meat of what he has to say, and wait for me to acknowledge that I am listening.

That would be helpful to me -- or at least it would make me feel like I don't say everything in one long mumble. (It's not all about me feeling better, but whatever the reason for him not hearing/understanding me, I want our communication to be effective.)

Thanks, you guys.

ION, I am online right now (2 a.m.) because I was awakened by horrible, powerful cramps in the front of my shin. I've had shin splints before, and charley horses in my legs, but not actual cramping in the front of my lower leg. It's weirdly fascinating, clincally -- I could feel all the muscles tense and then clench and spasm.

Don't know what I did -- we walked the dog after work, but not any longer than normal or anyplace out of the ordinary (sidewalks in our neighborhood).

I finally figured out that there was no one position in bed that would help (like witha charley horse, I just flex my foot, and problem solved), so I massaged my shin a little bit and finally got out of bed to take a Flexiril, on the theory that if I could get the spasm-y muscles to chill out, they'd stop spasming.

Here's hoping I'm right, because that is a weird and powerful pain.

Teppy, I sometimes get what you describe. What helps me:

Water, walking, and going to the bathroom. What works for me may not work for you.

What helps me: Water, walking, and going to the bathroom.

I detect some remarkable synergies in this strategy.

erika, so sorry for your loss.

Trudy, sorry for the illness and worries.

Steph, it might be that you need to get his attention before trying to communicate. I know that sometimes I have to get people to back up and repeat something if I wasn't paying attention when they started.

On hearing - years ago, the place I worked was having a United Way fundraising event. As part of it, they were doing hearing tests. One person yelled over the cubicle wall to another, asking if she was having her hearing tested. Her response? "huh?" (in the tone of someone who hadn't heard, if the context isn't clear).

I'm so sorry, erika.

Keeping your family in my thoughts, Trudy.

Just for a change, something nice.

In my family we call it being "caring weird." Many years ago, I said something, my mom said "what?", I made a crack about hearing impaired people and she replied "what are caring weird people?"

Yes, smonster, you met Betsy. (It's nice to get the testimonials.)