Strix - lots of love and support.

Well, this morning was a bust. First, I had to pee in a cup to prove I'm not pregnant. I have a shy bladder. It took a while, but I got that done. Then we got down to the actual business and my tipped uterus made it hard for her to get to the cervex so it was a no go. Now I have to go through the whole process at an OB/GYN (I had been going through my regular doc who can handle most of this stuff). The first consultation appointment I've found is April 4th. I just want this DONE. I don't want to start over.

Many hugs for alla the Bitches.

Buffistas rock so hard. Thank you all so very much.

I should get another tat once I get some equilibrium: "Depression lies."

askye, I will check out that site. I made an appointment for tomorrow with a psychiatrist, but for the CBT, I'll need to find a therapist.

amych, amyth, I DO have your digits, just in case. Gracias.

Nora, no big deal. I mean, what DO you say?! ts awkward.I just figured you were bsy.

Oh, DAMN this keyboard!

You guys are making me feel SO much better. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

Oh, separate post:

Ginger, I hope everything goes smoother and works out for the best.

Strix, it's not the Buffistas , but you can talk about what's going on with people who know. Although there are differing opinions.

Also have you had a sleep study done?

Strix, I hear CBT can work really well.

And, think of it this way: the two prescriptions in question are both known for being addictive. You will have to taper off at least the one for safety, but your doctor can help you with that. They have to deal with this often.

Looks like I'm rescheduled for a consult next week and then trying again with the Mirena on April 19th. Grrrrr. I mean, yes, it is only a month more, but clearly I had gotten myself spun up over this. Sigh.

askye, I have had three. One, they were like "you have to come back; we forgot to turn the machine on."

Two, they let me take my ambien, and told me I had mild sleep apnea when I sleep on my back (they woke me a lot and told me to switch positions)and I should get a CPAP machine. When they hooked me to one both time, I had a panic attack --and besides I DON'T sleep on my back!

I don't have trouble staying asleep; my brain works and works and I can't fall asleep. And I know when I DO fall asleep, I have good REM sleep; I have vivid (mostly) awesome dreams and wake up rested and satisfied.

I did a lot of research after my friends and DH had amini-intervention for me last night, and CBT was the most successful strategy. My friends wanted me to flush my Xanax and Ambien, and I wouldn't, and I'm glad I said no, because all research points to tapering off WITH concurrent CBT and talk therapy.

And my meatspace friends are awesomely supportive. One's an art therapist, one's an art teacher, and the other is starting to teach yoga, and she's trying to get me a scholarship with her yoga studio, because I can't afford it, I love it, and it's a great addition to my...journey? (That sounds so woo-woo.) But she was an alcoholic until a year ago, is sober and her life has completely turned around. Yoga was her therapy, and spirituality. I'm less spiritual, but yoga is great for me.

Wow, talky meat Strix! I should be working, but I am processing a lot today -- it's pretty much all I can think about.I guess...I'm working on me. I can't do my best on other people's stuff while I have the equivalent of a...what? Broken leg? Appendicitis?

Ah, well, at least I can laugh at myself!

Life is a journey-- that isn't woo-woo. I am not spiritual, but I do think that our 'job ' is to find as much happiness,/cotenntment that we can and give as much as we can.

as much as we can - differnt for everyone, different at every time of our lives.

I think Yoga is good, because it promotes body awareess. And I just picked up a new yoga magazine with 21 poses and 17 routines.

because more serenity might be my goal for my 5oth year

I hope you can get a scholarship if the yoga works for you .

Sorry the sleep tests didn't work out. I hope your psychiatrist is really good and helps you taper off safely.