. But I will say that my terrible habit is getting back to bed (after opening the back dog door for Cayenne) and reading youse guys on my iPhone (along with Twitter/FB) well into the morning. I should be using that time to sleep or just get the hell up. I annoy myself!

See, I've started doing this and sometimes I do let it go on too long, but I only have so many sites bookmarked on my phone. So I figure its my way to slowly wake up--I can read but not be awake enough to post or get out of bed, but once I've been reading a while I'm less likely to sleep again. Maybe not more likely to get out of bed, but...

Oh, I do this also. Usually I check b.org, email, and FB. If I'm awake in the middle of the night, I add Twitter.

I'm trying to imagine what the "math setting" on an alarm would be.

There are all sorts of math alarm clocks:

• >[link]
• >[link]

Basically they require you to commit a neuron or two in order to get the noise to stop.

I remember in grad school, in grad housing (which was cinderblock apartments with cold linoleum floors), in the middle of winter, needing to wake up early for class to finish a project. I set the TV timer to turn on to MTV (I hate that channel), rather loud. I remember waking up, saying an expletive, rushing as fast as I could on crutches and bare feet on cold floor to the living room, turning off the TV, rushing back to bed, and sleeping past the start of class. So much for that alarm clock.

These days, I have a dual alarm clock by the bed. First alarm is NPR rousing me from sleep. Second alarm is the buzzer saying "get in the shower now!!". In between those, my phone and iPad have a variety of ring tones to try and get me awake. I have found, with the new place, all the natural light, does help a lot. Except when I need to wake up before the bloody sun is up yet. Then, just makes the room colder.

There are all sorts of math alarm clocks:

NO. DO NOT WANT.

What if it made you subtract Jillifonts?

Then I would be cranky about math, freaked out about spiders, and would never be able to get the alarm to turn off. I'd probably end up setting the alarm clock on fire.

I bought my niece one of those alarm clocks that jumps off the table and rolls around the room and you have to get up and catch it to make the alarm stop. She said it worked. I would have smashed the thing to bits the first day, myself.

I would have given it to the dog as a toy.