Oh my goodness, everyone. I just caught up on the last few days in here and have a lot to say, but phones are hard for mearas. I must now go track down my laptop so I can respond appropriately. For now, hugs.

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Ugh, I know that 17 thing well too! Bobby has senioritis big time and just isn't doing his work. I hope I have made it clear enough that it isn't going to work for me. Other than the school crap he is pretty awesome so I am trying to deal.

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Ugh, I know that 17 thing well too! Bobby has senioritis big time and just isn't doing his work. I hope I have made it clear enough that it isn't going to work for me. Other than the school crap he is pretty awesome so I am trying to deal.

Nephew is still a junior, and hasn't done homework regularly in years, without threats, etc. He's ridiculously brilliant too.

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The brilliant kid thing is super challenging in the short term, but it is the thing that keeps me hopeful for the long term. I have always believed strongly that all the youthful transgressions were fleeting events and that one day will come the light bulb moment, or series of moments, and success will follow. Just have to keep them from doing permanent harm type stuff.

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meara

And appropriately, I want to start with meara by saying how wonderful I think you are and how much I believe you would make an amazing partner for some lucky woman. I'm sorry it's been so difficult, and I'm extremely sorry you've felt so unwanted. You are beautiful, intelligent, successful, and fun. In short, a catch.

Laura, I'm so sorry things have been so rough with the older son. I agree that what you describe sounds like classic and very severe ADHD. I hope he agrees to do some testing and tries some meds (I think that is a way money would not be in any way enabling); they may well change his life.

I just submitted an application to adopt this dog: [link] They say they'll take a few days to respond, so I guess now I wait.

Hil, what a sweet dog! I wish you luck in your application.

Omnis, I am speechless. How horrific. Please don't hesitate about this--you need to tell your mom, and you definitely need to be ready to explain that he is no longer welcome in your home.

Based on the records, it's not some "Oh, I was 21, and dated a 16 year old and her parents pressed charges" thing. It's rape. 3 times. […] Personally, were this my mom or my sister, I would also report the relationship and hopefully the break-up to the local PD's Sex Crimes division to have it on record, have her change her locks, and sign her up for a self-defense course.

He's definitely on the official Megan's List: [link]. He's listed as "transient," so if he does acquire an address, you need to report it. You probably should tell the police where he is, because they may have outstanding warrants.

What Erin and Ginger said. This is EXACTLY how Megan's Law is meant to work. I know you are empathetic and always want to see the best in people, but Omnis, this is not minor. Three convictions for three very serious, very vile acts--he is a serial rapist. This is a dangerous, evil man, Omnis, and those mug shots are recent.

Those 3 offenses -- not 1, THREE -- listed are not just a red flag; they are a fucking California king-sized quilt of HELL NO. They are violent sexual crimes against women.

Exactly. Have empathy for his victims. This is not someone who you should feel even a second of empathy about.

Damn Scrappy! So awful! My school laid off our HR person five years ago, and it was the most disgusting, stupid decision they've made. Our business office director, who is also a giant jerk in many ways, is now also the HR person. In theory. Which basically means we don't have an HR person. I wish you all the luck in the world in finding another job swiftly.

Odds are everything will go perfectly well. But he's nearly out of resilience on coping with his body's collapse.

Oh Connie, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for his anxiety and stress and for you trying to be a caregiver and supporter for someone who doesn't want you to do so. Your love for your husband is palpable, even when he is difficult to deal with, and I wish you everything good in helping him cope. I agree that creating a spreadsheet with all of his past medical info and current medications is a great idea. Then you can bring a copy any time you are going in and write "see attached" on the forms so you don't have to write it all out over and over again. Also, this:

He's lucky to have you, Connie. Being understood is one of the greatest gifts to be given.

Scrappy is, as usual, wise.

And finally {{sj}} because you've got a lot on your mind right now. I'm sorry it's been so hard.

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Thanks, Pix. I feel guilty for being so whiny lately, but lately I feel if I don't brain dump some of this stuff somewhere it is going to overwhelm me. I'm grateful to have a safe place to do those brain dump.

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Good on you, Laura, for setting some boundaries. I hope it's the wake up call he heeds

I'm at work, which was fine and kind of fun... But now shit is not working properly and I don't want to be here much longer. Please god, let my coworker find a fix.

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The format of the 'date' tonight sounds kinda interesting to me. Not as much pressure as a one on one, yet not as overwhelming as speed dating.

Exactly what I thought. Speed dating was horrible for me. Physically, difficult, as it was the guys who had to get up and change tables every 5 minutes. And 1-on-1 with a stranger has great potential for an awkward dinner.

That said, tonight was meh. Of the 6, 2 didn't show (one gal, one guy) and one gal was an hour late. However, the reservation was written down for 7, and we were told 8. So the restaurant released the table. We didn't get a table until 9. Conversation was varied. Sometimes awkward quiet, sometimes pretty good. The biggest discussions were Lance Armstrong, and guns in America (and schools), which was based on question to the HS school teacher. Surprisingly, all of us were gun owners or gun range for fun people.

That said, no connections. The ladies were not my type, in either sense. Nice. But nothing close to a spark.

Interesting was the discussions on the company. They all have been doing this for a while. I was the only newbie. There was a lot of discussion of "before the economy went bad, they would host..." and describe the various types of mixer events. Sounds like they used to have 2 women running the LA/OC region. Now it's just one, and she is based out of SF. Which might explain why we all lived in LA county, and she booked us a dinner in OC. Two of us were from my area. We could have carpooled! Ha. So, we all had a long drive home. Strange.

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(incidently, I started writing that last post when I got home. I woke up, turned on the iPad to see the post not complete and a LOT of "hhhhhhhhhhh" as the bluetooth keyboard turned off, I guess. Kinda funny)

Now, house cleaning, and calling mom. Fun ways to spend a day off, no?

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