Maria, what they all said! There is nothing you are feeling that is unnatural or inappropriate. Allow yourself the emotional space to feel whatever you feel.

{{Strix}} You are the most articulate out of spoons person evah! I am so sorry you are dealing with so much. Sending love and strength and absolute permission to be as me-me-me as you need. From a distance, because I want nothing to do with your germiness up close and personal. We'll take a rain check on the cuddles, k?

Daniel, ~ma for your ma. And massive hugs to Maria and Strix and anyone else who needs them.

Maria, please don't even think about holding back here. This is the safe place where you can say the things you'd never ever say anywhere else. No one's judging you badly for it.

Strix, good GRIEF. Were you just going through your quota of illness for the next five years to get it all over with at once? I'm glad you're finally getting your spoons back!

My life is pleasantly dull by comparison. The biggest thing going on here is painting my house. The inside, that is. It's time to get rid of the renter's-special boring ecru and pick my own colors. I'm finally starting to feel like this is MY house, not just another place I'm living in for a while.

Doc says I am germ-free, just recovering like a Victorian maiden.

I have put in a load of dishes and laundry, taken out the office trash and recycling, drank some Harney's Tower of London tea, and I think I must have a lie-down before I shower or try anything else.

Baby steps -- this left me utterly buggered.

Zen, it felt like it. It was ridiculous, and I was doing EVERYTHING right to feel better. Just kept snowballing, and making me feel like Job.

And M, poor noodle, had the pinkeye(one eye), and the flu, too, when he got back to the coast, albeit less severely, thanks be.

Germ free - well in that case, tacklehug!

Yikes, Strix! Thanks for checking in here- I was worried about you. Gentle hugs to aid your recovery.

{{Maria}} hugs for it all; and pointing to the wise things said before me. And the best buds thing- people (like this Katie) sometimes look for drama to enrich their lives. And having an acquaintance who tragically passed away is an easy in for their own self-mythologizing. I bet you a nickel that's all her and her issues.

Ah, Strix... allgergic reaction to eye drops... may not be the worst thing, but it definitely makes a Top Twenty list. Do be gentle with yourself.

but when I didn't even know about her but they were "best buds,"

And the best buds thing- people (like this Katie) sometimes look for drama to enrich their lives. And having an acquaintance who tragically passed away is an easy in for their own self-mythologizing. I bet you a nickel that's all her and her issues.

My opinion? They weren't. I know there are probably lots of things you didn't know about Rob, but this isn't one of them. She sounds like the kind of person who enthusiastically decides that some person is her BFF 4EVah!!1!, when the other person is like, "Eh? Uh, yeah, I know her."

It's all from her POV, and, despite not knowing her or Rob, I would bet good money it's all a one-sided "best buds" dealie. Someone like that is best ignored, but it's got to be hard when you see it on Facebook. I wouldn't be able to ignore it, because things like that drive me insane.

But since I'm at a remove from it, my opinion is that it was all one-sided, and it's really easy for people to mythologize their "best bud" -- and the nature of their friendship, such as it is -- when they've died.

If I go too fast, I know I will relapse;

Smart woman. Feel better, Strix.

It won't have fully kicked in yet but I got my flu shot on Monday. I wish I'd done it months ago.

I have been stirring a spoon of almond butter into my oatmeal. Makes it all flavory and feels dense. Like I'm eating an actual breakfast and not just shoving oatmeal in that open spot of of my face.

Expecting plumber. Who called about twenty-five minutes ago to say he was running a little late due to all of the local hard freezes and associated 20-hour days of plumbing jobs. Whatever. I am not awake yet.