Last night my dinner was a coke and corn chex (ETA: plain from the box, not with milk or anything).

That wasn't the explanation I was looking for. Was the Corn Chex in the Coke?

(I'm probably going to delete at least some of that soon.)

No, they were separate. I drank the coke, and ate the chex by handfuls from the box, because I was too lazy to cook anything.

For lunch today I ate my roommate's ravioli. She had offered them last night but I was too lazy. Now I have to buy her some more

ETA: oh jeez, Hil, that's annoying. Reminds me a bit of Tom's issue the other day.

Hil, that sounds incredibly frustrating. I'm sorry your mom wasn't able to hear and acknowledge the things you were saying. Ugh.

Maybe your mother is trying to reconcile how she may have hurt you both and the minor shit is her start to recognizing the more serious stuff?

One can hope.

Some days I regret not trying to engage my mother on issues before her death. More days I'm glad I decided to let it all go. Of course it resulted in not speaking to any of my blood family for over a decade, but I was apparently not missed.

Your coping methods will more than likely vary.

Weirdly, Facebook has resulted in my exchanging more information with my remaining sister than we've traded this century. (I love using that phrase)

Hi Hil. I do have one thought. It seems like shopping in a timely manner is tough on you - which given your medical issues make sense. Are there any places in your service area that can deliver decent vegan food? Both actual vegan places, and places that include vegan choices on their menus? Also are there any grocery delivery services in you area. If you had a backup way of getting food when you just don't have the spoons for shopping, it sounds like that would make life easier.

Also, dry goods are pretty easy to get on-line. Would ordering your noodles and dry packaged dinners and stuff like that on-line make your life any easier, even if you still had to fetch fresh and frozen stuff in person? I'm sort of guessing that the places where you get your fresh food have the dry goods, so it would not really save any trips. ON the other hand if you could keep plenty of dry goods on hand, you could at least eat them when out of fresh food. And your in person trips would involve a shorter time in the store and fewer things to carry. So maybe still a win.

On dealing with your MOther I have nothing, other than I hope you can avoid any self-blaming which you already know.