But to me, the big difference in how we are raising kids now is the much more active and involved role the fathers play, fathers really invested in raising their kids and being a good father to them.

Yeah, I definitely spend much more time with Emmett and Matilda than my dad did with me. And my dad was a pretty involved dad for his time - he coached my Little League team for two years, and we learned to Scuba dive together and stuff like that.

And just from my generation of friends who are parents, and all the dads I know from coaching Little League myself, it's a widespread attitude. I know several fathers whose entire lives really revolve around parenting. Not in a creepy stage-manage their kids every move way. But just that's their focus. I know one father who created and ran his own business primarily so that he'd have more time with his kids.

So there's definitely been a huge cultural shift around that. Not coincidentally this revolution came rolling in with Feminism in the early 70s.

A friend just heard from her, so she's alive. We're trying to figure out further details.

Thank you all.

Glad to hear it, Shir.

Thank you, me too. And now I get to kill her for the heart attack.

So, uh, Nora? Got someone I'd like you to meet.

Right on! Well, on Friday night there's a cask ale crawl between the Avenue and the Irish House. maybe we can hang out for that in a casual style, or do something else, whatever works.

Being around a smoker when you're trying to quit is super hard, that sucks. But you're right, not much to be done about it.

The morning thunderstorms are making it very hard to get up and at 'em this weekend. Did make it out to my volunteer shift for White Linen Night last night but will probably not go downtown for Satchmo Fest.

Glad your friend has been found, Shir.

Want to know how P-C's night went!

Ryan is such a handsome boy! And Mei Mei is pretty darling too. I love how proud you are of him.

Aw. I really am. I'm proud that he can say 'Triceratops'. (Kind of proud that he reads a picture of two T-rexes advancing on a triceratops as them all being friends who have adventures together.) I'm proud that he's just about got the hang of this toilet training lark. And most of all I'm proud that he genuinely cares about others. He has a kind heart, this boy.

When we were in Hawaii there was a long conversation with Cody's aunts and uncles about whether or not our generation of parents are more permissive. I said I didn't think so, at least not necessarily, because I tend to model a lot of my parenting on how I was raised. I wasn't hit or spanked, or at least if I was it was rarely enough that I don't remember a single incident. And believe me, the no spanking thing is what they meant when they said we were more permissive because then they went into long memories of being beaten with belts and hiding from their fathers and such. But to me, the big difference in how we are raising kids now is the much more active and involved role the fathers play, fathers really invested in raising their kids and being a good father to them. Tons of those dads here on this board. And I think that's all win.

Agree completely. I know that, comparing the time I can spend with Ryan to the time my dad could spend with his kids, I feel I got the much better deal. (I have great respect and admiration for my father, of course, who is one of the most accomplished and principled men I know. My parents were not just great parents, but great role models.)

The other father whose praises I shall sing is Biyi's father. I don't think I know any other father who's been so selfless in his devotion to his family. He held them all together when Biyi's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. He did the same when Biyi's older sister died of asthma. All while excelling in his own profession, dealing with the strictures of living in Communist China, including through the Great Leap Forward and the Cultural Revolution, and accepting and embracing the choices of his daughter in living her own life. And now he's a devoted grandfather to Ryan. I don't know how he can live through all that with no bitterness.

Ryan is just the luckiest little boy. He has two remarkable grandfathers.

I know several fathers whose entire lives really revolve around parenting.

This made me tear up a little. It's the most wonderful thing.

Ryan is such a cutie pie! As is his cousin. I love how joyful he always seems to be in his photos.

This made me tear up a little. It's the most wonderful thing.

Me too.

Shir, I'm so glad you heard from your friend!

smonster, any chance you could mention to him that you're trying to quit and it would help you if he didn't smoke around you? Or would that come off as too holier-than-thou?

billytea, Ryan really is a lucky little boy. I love hearing you talk about Biyi's family; it's clear that they're wonderful people and that you love them a great deal.

And I know a bunch of dads of my generation (and many on this board) who are totally focused on their kids and on being great parents. I think it's very much the norm among my friends and family. Which makes me feel really lucky to be raising a kid right now.

Oh, Shir, thank heavens. Glad she's okay.

Nora, that could work! Will check with him.

Being around a smoker when you're trying to quit is super hard, that sucks. But you're right, not much to be done about it.

smonster, any chance you could mention to him that you're trying to quit and it would help you if he didn't smoke around you? Or would that come off as too holier-than-thou?

Oh, I wasn't clear. I'm still rocking along no problem with my e-cig. I just meant from a long-term perspective on his health.

No time to look at Ryan pics now, but have marked post for later cuteness binging.

But to me, the big difference in how we are raising kids now is the much more active and involved role the fathers play, fathers really invested in raising their kids and being a good father to them. Tons of those dads here on this board. And I think that's all win.

Absolutely.