Speaking of pain, I may have decided that I can no longer continue breastfeeding (though I'll still pump). Among other problems (mainly low supply), it still hurts enough to make me cry, nearly two months in. And yes, I have seen multiple lactation consultants and gotten almost more support and advice than I can stand. I feel sad and guilty about making this decision, but I think it's time.

Oh man, that's no good. Sad I get, but try to let the guilty go.

Try to let the sad and guilty go, Kate. I, too, had a lot of problems and visited the lactation consultants and felt that guilt, but K and I are here on the other side to tell you that you three will all be better off for doing what works for you.

Oh, yeah, let that guilty go, Kate! If it ain't working, it ain't working, and that's no one's fault. You can't reason with recalcitrant boobies!

Your baby has gotten some of the bennies of breastfeeding, and now will be absolutely fine switching. It's ok.

Thanks, you guys. I keep telling myself I could make this work if only I'd put more effort into it, and maybe that's true, but... I've already put a lot of effort into it! I worked hard but it just wasn't enough, and I have to be OK with that, and with drawing the line here.

Sparky, I'm sorry you had similar trouble, but very glad to have your perspective on the issue. I know that, even though it seems so huge to me now, later on I'll remember it as just one of the many challenges of parenthood, and not The Single Most Important Thing that determines whether or not I love my daughter.

Kate, no guilt. The most important thing for Rose? A happy relaxed mom who's not in pain during feedings. I wound up giving up breastfeeding early on, and I didn't even bother to try with Sara, and she's a happy, healthy, well-adjusted kid who knows exactly how much I love her.

Awww, that's tough, Kate. But know that we had to stop breastfeeding Emmett at about 6 weeks and it made everything so much easier for us. And he never suffered for it.

Breastfeeding shouldn't be torturous. We have other options nowadays. Don't fetishize the process of feeding your kid.

Certainly there's a lot of lovely bonding possible there, but ultimately it's a protein intake system.

It will be fine, Kate. Honestly, looking back I wish I had stopped sooner because I would have removed a huge source of stress from all our lives, and I am just left wondering what the hell kind of brainwashing I'd been subjected to, to actually think that biting my lip trying not to cry at every feeding was better than smiling down at her while she took a bottle.

Certainly there's a lot of lovely bonding possible there

And bottle-feeding isn't that different. I know Stephen got a lot out of feeding the kids, and so did they, for one, but bonding happens all the time with your baby.

Man, why did I wait so long to talk about this here?? I would never have guessed that so many people I know (here and elsewhere) had to give up breastfeeding too.

Certainly there's a lot of lovely bonding possible there, but ultimately it's a protein intake system.

Yeah, this is what I have to remind myself of. Also, that not a lot of happy bonding is going on when one person is in serious pain and the other is crying and thrashing around in frustration. I mean, sometimes she likes nursing, but often it just doesn't go very well, and then we're all unhappy. We'll be OK without it.