{{{omnis}}} You are doing what you can and I'm sure your calls mean a lot to your father right now. You can't change your siblings, no matter how much you might want to. As far as the short sale goes, I really hope this one comes through for you.

omnis, a pre-approval ought to be good for a certain period of time, so even if this sale falls through, you can go look at another house with pre-approval in hand, which will make the whole process much easier and quicker. My sister says never start looking at houses unless you have a pre-approval. It's like cash in hand.

Apparently (i'm still learning) the pre-certify is easy to get, and is just a "yup, we can do business with him" and gets your foot in the door. The pre-approval is specific to a property AND me, and is harder to get. So, not sure how much it would transfer to another property, should this one fall through.

omnis, a pre-approval ought to be good for a certain period of time, so even if this sale falls through, you can go look at another house with pre-approval in hand, which will make the whole process much easier and quicker. My sister says never start looking at houses unless you have a pre-approval. It's like cash in hand

Our pre-approval lasted for 3 months at a time. They do have to run your credit every time they do one, which can lower your credit rating.

What Zen said about pre-approval. It's key.

And please listen to Nora. I am glad she wrote what she did, because I kept wanting to say something but didn't feel I could string the right words together. And then Nora said it exactly right. You are not your siblings' keeper. Just keep doing what you personally can for your dad.

So, not sure how much it would transfer to another property, should this one fall through.

The pre-approval should still apply if you find another place in the same price range. If it is a pricier place you find next time, nsm.

The pre-approval is specific to a property AND me, and is harder to get. So, not sure how much it would transfer to another property, should this one fall through.

Unless this is peculiar to short sales, the pre-approval is specific to you and based on documented income, credit rating etc. But it does not tie you to a property.

It is a good thing you found this out, though omnis. A coworker was precertified, SOLD HER HOUSE, and then made the offer on the house she wanted. And then she, her mentally challenged brother, her niece and her niece's baby all had to move in with a friend while she is looking for another house.

wrod. Signed "knows too much about house paperwork, cause my mom used to do that at work." She can't explain how a reverse mortgage works so I'd say "Don't do it, old people! Resist the Fonz!"

Yeah, not giving notice on the apartment until the papers are signed. That gives 30 days to pack the old place, paint the new place and move in. It will cost a bit more (one month of mortgage AND rent), but so worth the headaches/stress.

And then Nora said it exactly right. You are not your siblings' keeper. Just keep doing what you personally can for your dad.

Yeah. I gotta keep reminding myself of that. Thanks everyone. It's just so damn frustrating. But, health issues and deaths bring out the true colors in people, right? I dunno. Maybe it's because he wasn't the best of fathers growing up?? I dunno. I just gotta stop thinking about it. Do what I do, be who I am. And move on.

Now. How do I get my dad to make a will? Oy. He hates to even think about it. And now that he's got cancer, who knows. I'm afraid to suggest it, for fear it will be like saying "it's not going to work, so write it all down". But it would be great to have that living will stuff too. To DNR or not? Burial? Ashes? Where to bury or spread ashes? Stupid shit like that.