What the hell?

Fuck Arbor Day! Fuck it!

~ma for your ma, Jen! No more falling down, on holidays or otherwise.

Sunburn, ouch, Connie. Do not like. Beaded things, however, I like (but never wear).

Fuck Arbor Day! Fuck it!

Darn trees and their... pollen.

Jen, noggin-ma for your mom!

I have a plot, and it's going to involve me getting this dress:

I love that! I have a wedding to go to in May, and I think I might just need a new dress. Hmmm.

I set the oven ON FIRE this week. I am not even joking. Not the stovetop; the oven. It was like something out of I Love Lucy. (Also, I am deeply suspicious that our smoke detector only works when it wants to.)

Yikes!

It was this whole deal where I made a cake last Saturday, in a lamb-shaped mold that fits together like a clamshell, but the top half has a lip all the way around it so it almost sits down over the bottom half. Anyway, the excess cooking spray from the top half dripped down on the floor of the oven while it was baking.

And yet -- it did not burst into flame then. Oh, no. On Sunday or Monday we were going to have pizza, and when we preheated the oven, smoke started billowing out. We quickly figured out it was the oil that dripped onto the floor of the oven, and ran around opening windows and grabbing fans to ventilate.

Tim finally kicked me out of the kitchen (wisely so), and when I checked on him a little later, he told me that the oil on the floor of the oven did actually catch fire. But -- according to him -- they were small flames. So he grabbed a sheet of aluminum foil that was there and set it over the inferno and it went out.

Through all of this, the smoke alarm in the dining room never went off. (Keep in mind this house is just under 900 sq. feet, and the dining room is right next to the kitchen.) I am dubious about the smoke alarm's ability to sufficiently warn us in time of an impending baking-related flamey disaster.

I love that! I have a wedding to go to in May, and I think I might just need a new dress. Hmmm.

Ooh, I bet it would look lovely on you, with your blonde hair.

I was going to lord it over J when he gets home tomorrow that Chet, our four-month-old puppy, had no housebreaking accidents the entire week he was gone--Because I am clearly the Chet Whisperer. Sadly, Chet peed in the house not once, not twice, but THREE times today. Way to regress, dude!

You know when you get in a productivity loop and can't. stop. doing? Yeah, I'm pulling myself out of one right now. But my house looks so much better! Totally worth it. And Nerdist podcasts make great background.

Chet! The peeing happens outside, not inside!!

Steph, that is a freaky story. Glad no serious damage was done.

...dammit. I am not asleep. My brain wouldn't shut off, so I just got up and wrote a cover letter for a job I think I would have loved... fifteen years ago - [link] Working 12-14 hrs a day, maybe six days a week? I don't know that I could handle that for very long, and my animals sure as shit wouldn't appreciate it. And it's not like I'd be making mad bank. But I bet I'd get fitter.

Also? Let's be real, punctuality (especially in the morning) ain't in my wheelhouse.

Part of me just wants to see if I can get an interview, and meet the person who wrote it. It keeps getting revised; I've seen at least four different versions.

Okay, going to take some melatonin and try sleeping again.

Jen! Eek! Hope your Mom is ok!

Steph, that totally sounds like something I would do!!!

Scrappy, just when I get proud of myself for finally figuring out Toto's new diabetes pee needs, he'll have like four accidents in a day. Silly doggies. But yay puppy!!!

I have wicked bad insomnia. We're three weeks away from the wedding, and we went away for the weekend for our engagement pictures. I brilliantly decided I would take this opportunity to leave my phone and computer at home to take a complete break. I think this as backfired! Thank goodness for Lloyd's iPad! So, anyone still up??

Heh. Smonster, that posting has already been deleted, so probably rewritten again...

Yes, now I'm curious about the mystery posting!

saw many perveyours of beads and thingies

I somehow read this as "saw many perverts" and I was like "O RLY?!"

Ugh. Went on third date with girl, she took me to her friend's birthday party. Friends were cool, really liked one of them, everyone was playing games (we played "Life", and then mixed CatchPhrase with Jenga...). Unfortunately, I was hoping she'd loosen up and be more fun around her friends, and maybe with a little booze...but no. There's just no spark, even though she's cute and nice. Sigh. And I'd been feeling kinda crappy all day, too. So eventually I said I wanted to leave, and could take a cab and she was all "No no, I'll drive you", and I was like "Well, I think the party's only lasting another half hour or so here" and she insisted on driving me and as we got to her car was all "So, did you want to go out with me again?" and I had to be like "No, not really". Ugh.

But really, if I'm more excited about the idea of staying home and catching up on TiVo than going out with you? You're really not the girl for me.