I'm not okay with anyone being assholes without provocation. Why bother? I am all for a default of detached near-pleasantness

Yes. Yes, this, very much.

I've never had problems crossing any borders, but that may be because my appearance confuses them.

But suppose someone asks you about homosociality tomorrow? You'll be all "nipple-sucking-SOMETHING" and then you won't know any more.

I'd just point behind them and say, "Look! Hookers and blow!" and then run away.

I've never had problems crossing any borders, but that may be because my appearance confuses them.

Have they ever suspected you of smuggling contraband in your petticoats?

My general impression regarding the USA/Canada border has been that the Canadian border guards are all "Welcome to our country! Have a pleasant visit!" while the American ones are more "Who the fuck are you and why should we let you in?!?"

This was not at all my experience, as I spent over an hour after my last flight to Toronto trying to explain to immigration that, no, I was not moving to Canada.

Same here. And the fact that I was coming for my boyfriend's sister's funeral only fanned their suspicions. Jackasses.

ita's links = ignorance is bliss

Timelies all!

Haven't really had any hassles with Canada/ US border crossings. The last couple of Canadian trips have been by car, if that makes any difference. (Crossing into Canada on our most recent trip we had a mostly standard exchange: Where are you from, where are you going, how long will you be there? When Gary answered "a small SF convention" to the question of why we were going the guard asked how we'd heard about this convention. Gary replied "I've been attending it for the last 16 years")

I clicked. And now I wish I hadn't. So, you know, the usual. And yes, I was warned, totally my fault.

I have no experience with Border Services. But my strategy for getting through customs unscathed has been to pick the line for the oldest, crankiest guy, figuring they just don't care anymore.

I'm waiting for shrift's Canada border crossing story, which involves a bridesmaid's dress.

A friend of mine from Tennessee picked me up on the way to Toronto, where we were to attend a La Femme Nikita convention. There was a fancy dress party, so my friend had a bridesmaid's dress in the dry cleaning plastic in the trunk, because what other use was she going to get out of it? When we attempted to cross the border into Canada, my friend helpfully explained why we were going to Toronto.

We got pulled over tout de suite.

Out of the car, hands against the wall while they searched the vehicle. One border guard harangued us about how we were entering a foreign country and there were LAWS blah blah oh god what the hell. Once she discovered the dress in the trunk, then came the Canadian inquisition. Eventually we convinced the angry border guard that we weren't planning to sell anything while we were still in the metric system.

I'm still unsure as to why the dress was a point of contention. We could only conclude that there was some sort of black market for bridesmaid's dresses, and that our "smuggling" attempt got me flagged with Interpol, because for years afterward I was always selected for a random search at the airport.

And now I wish I hadn't

Do you think it's true? It can't be true. It must be an April Fool's prank or something.