They found a plane for us, and it looks like we'll be leaving in another hour or so. Yay.
Maria, you're doing what you can, and that's all you need to do.
I am not...I am not the damsel in distress. I am not some case. I have to work this. I've lived in a cave for 5 years in a world where they killed my kind like cattle. I am not going to be cut down by some monster flu. I am better than that. What a wonder...how very scared I am.
Fred ,'A Hole in the World'
Natter 68: Bork Bork Bork
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
Tom Scola - Sep 17, 2011 7:45:39 am PDT #26790 of 30001
Remember that the frontier of the Rebellion is everywhere. And even the smallest act of insurrection pushes our lines forward.
Maria - Sep 17, 2011 7:53:10 am PDT #26791 of 30001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
Thanks, everyone. Rationally, I know I'm doing everything I can, but emotionally, it's a whole other ball of wax. The first 30-45 days of INF treatment are horrible. He's in for 5-day a week IV infusions that last 20-30 minutes, and he won't be able to drive. I won't be able to take him, and then there's the whole feeling like you're going to die part of the treatment. I don't want him to be alone. His father said he'd move in with us for the first month and shuttle him back and forth to treatment, but I don't know. It's not like he's getting any younger, and this will be rough on him too. Taking care of my husband is supposed to be MY job. I just don't want anyone to think I'm trying to avoid the hard stuff.
Lisa, if you pop on the board at some point, how did you do it?
javachik - Sep 17, 2011 7:57:52 am PDT #26792 of 30001
Our wings are not tired.
Maria, taking care of your husband is everyone's job, honey. Please do not think marriage means it's all on you. Marriage is an enhancement for caring. It's not the only caring. You're being your wonderful self and Rob is going to need a lot of wonderful selves!
Jesse - Sep 17, 2011 7:59:17 am PDT #26793 of 30001
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.
Speaking only for my own parents, they still like to take care of me, and I'm pretty sure that wouldn't change if I were married.
Maria - Sep 17, 2011 8:04:40 am PDT #26794 of 30001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
I know. My parents do too. This is just hitting all of my vulnerable spots, both in me and with my relationship. I've been very vocal about how close DH and I came to splitting up on a number of occasions. We've had a rocky road, and his parents have been witness to that.
Amy - Sep 17, 2011 8:09:26 am PDT #26795 of 30001
Because books.
Everything's going to feel raw and emotional right now, Maria. Right now you just have to focus on doing what you can do, like Tom said. You can work, and keep you guys fed and housed, and you can give him all the emotional support you can in whatever way you can. The families can help with some of the daily stuff.
It's good to talk about it, though. That's what we're here for.
javachik - Sep 17, 2011 8:09:58 am PDT #26796 of 30001
Our wings are not tired.
Well, that makes sense. And illness isn't going to magically make everything okay, obviously. But you've never, ever been one to back down from someone in need, husband or not. But even if you two had a perfect relationship (which I don't think exists anyway), this would be a LOT. You're going to need to give yourself permission to let others help any way they can, because you'll need it. And it's good for others to help - for them too. It's not just Rob who needs help and love, it's you.
Pix - Sep 17, 2011 8:12:14 am PDT #26797 of 30001
The status is NOT quo.
Pointing and nodding at Java's post.
le nubian - Sep 17, 2011 8:16:40 am PDT #26798 of 30001
"And to be clear, I am the hell. And the high water."
try to feel okay with other people helping you. I think that will go a long way in helping you both through this crisis.
You are already carrying a huge burden trying to keep the household running and doing research, etc. You need help.
Allyson - Sep 17, 2011 8:27:24 am PDT #26799 of 30001
Wait, is this real-world child support, where the money goes to buy food for the kids, or MRA fantasyland child support where the women just buy Ferraris and cocaine? -Jessica
Jesse and msbelle, insent at FB, because my email is being douchey this morning. I need advices!