Well, that makes sense. And illness isn't going to magically make everything okay, obviously. But you've never, ever been one to back down from someone in need, husband or not. But even if you two had a perfect relationship (which I don't think exists anyway), this would be a LOT. You're going to need to give yourself permission to let others help any way they can, because you'll need it. And it's good for others to help - for them too. It's not just Rob who needs help and love, it's you.

Pointing and nodding at Java's post.

try to feel okay with other people helping you. I think that will go a long way in helping you both through this crisis.

You are already carrying a huge burden trying to keep the household running and doing research, etc. You need help.

Jesse and msbelle, insent at FB, because my email is being douchey this morning. I need advices!

Taking care of humans is hard work. You need back up.

Also, Happy Birthday, and yay no more treatment, Perkins!

I am thrilled that Perkin's birthday coincided with the ending of treatments. That is such spectacular timing!

(I mostly keep my Happy Birthdays) to Facebook these days. But I can be meta here!

I'm kind of psyched because the beastly fans and dehumidifiers that have been noisily sucking my house ALL WEEK are being removed this morning! The rest of the post-flood work won't be a cinch, but at least now I can leave the hotel and hang out at my house to do laundry, etc, without being driven insane by the noise.

If anyone here has State Farm and a claim on your homeownership policy that required extensive repairs, could you please let me know? The first week managing the emergency stuff has gone okay, but now for the repairs process, I have loads of questions and don't really know what to expect. Their website has my claim info, but it hasn't been updated since last Monday. More to the point, the areas of their website where I am supposed to be able to click through and see how (in general) the repairs and claims process is supposed to work? The links aren't working. So if you have experience and can tell me what waiting periods/delays etc are normal, then I'll know what to expect. (Please don't suggest Googling, because I already have and it led to Scary State Farm Stories which are not at all helpful and in fact very harmful to my state of mind.)

Congrats, Suzi!

Sparky, I hope this helps get Sass home.

Happy birthday, Perkins! End-of-treatments is a great birthday present!

I also use coconut oil, or sweet almond oil, to remove makeup.

Maria, take all the help that's offered, seriously. Echoing what others have said -- you can't do all this alone; you're going to need help too. People who love you both want to help; letting them help shows you love and trust them - -don't feel bad about it!

java, call your State Farm rep. They should be happy to answer your questions and reassure you. That's what they're there for! If he/she isn't in today, leave a voicemail - I've had insurance reps call me back on weekends. And for gosh sakes, don't Google! That way lies madness.

Skipping oh-my-goodness-you-don't-wanna-know-how-many posts, because today is such a big double Buffista event, even I at my current computers?-what's-that? lack of internet time can't not acknowledge.

Happy birthday, Perkins! With lots of wishes for a great day and a wonderful year!

Happy birthday, beloved Phoenix Board! With lots of wishes for great posts from wonderful people behind them!

Zen, I've been on the phone with various State Farm people all week..and honestly they've been pretty vague and not great at returning phone calls (I've been waiting for 3 days for my actual adjuster to call me back...). If I learn that this is normal, I may not freak out so much. I just need to know when to press them more without turning into the crazy paranoid person.