I know intellectually that it's okay to not want to have kids. I know intellectually that it doesn't make me a failure as a woman or a human. But the way it *feels*...FAIL.

I am very sorry it makes you feel like that. I knew EARLY (like, around 5 or 6 years old) on that I didn't want kids. I love kids. If I am having a crap day, time with Princess Tickybox cheers me up. But I don't want any of my own. I'm too selfish about my time and my stuff, and I know that.

Daycare providers aren't around on weekends.

I feel somehow deeply ashamed, because, my hand to God, we really did neither jack nor shit to potty train her. Her daycare provider did it all M-F 8-6, starting when Matilda was younger than I would even have thought of starting, and then one evening when Hec picked Matilda up she said, "Oh, maybe you should get her a training potty for your place. I think she's ready."

An angel straight from God, that woman is. Clearly, the solution for any Buffista who's on the fence about kids but put off by the prospect of toilet training is to move to San Francisco (of course, moving to San Francisco is the default solution for a myriad of Buffista issues [except for Buffistas like Emily S and tommyrot, who just need to move back to San Francisco]).

My brother and sister in law have very deliberately chosen not to have kids (and to lead a super cool simple life) that is awesome. They love their nieces and nephews but just wanted the life they built. I think it is an awesome and enviable choice.

Fair warning that I am totally irrational because of alcohol consumption.

I am nowhere where I thought I'd be at this stage in my life. I'm ordinary. I haven't made a real difference in the world. I'm about to start a job I'm dreading and on the verge of detesting. I'm not a mom. I have a husband who insists on pursuing his own dreams to the exclusion of mine, which led to the taking of said job because we need to pay the fucking bills, and oh yeah, he may be dying. Life's a fucking blast.

Carry on.

Yes, one of the reasons I don't have pets is because I refuse to live with anything that doesn't know how to use and flush the toilet on its own.

I have heard that you can train cats to use the toilet. I am just saying.

Yay for electricity and potty training!

Life's a fucking blast.

NSM right now, huh? I'm sorry. You deserve good things. You're a kind, thoughtful, hard working, deeply caring person.

I am hoping that your new job has unexpected silver linings.

Allyson, my wife is your age and we have infant twins sleeping blissfully in the next room.

Nor were either of us considered likely to marry anyone before we started dating each other. When my (now) wife moved to a University within driving distance from mine and told some of our academic acquaintances that she was thinking of dating me, she was told "Don't do it! It won't work out! He is very charming but he is a lone-wolf. Always has been, always will be" We were talking about marriage 6 months later.

Life's a fucking blast.

Oh, honey. I wish you could come here for a few days and let me pamper you. Anytime you want, just yell.

He is very charming but he is a lone-wolf.

Ooh, the mysterious vibe. How old are the twins now?

and we have infant twins sleeping blissfully in the next room.

It's a miracle!