Thanks guys. It's okay. I know I'll get through it. And like I said, it's all me-adjacent, not me-direct. But the first thing finances being an issue did was separate the SO & I for the summer, (and he might have a cold, incidentally) so I would probably weather all this more easily were we side by side. We've been doing good about communicating, but it's not the same.

Sorry for all the woe! It is just a lot at once.

And about the fire, 60mph winds expected tomorrow and it passed the trigger point, jumping containment lines to do so, so it was absolutely the right decision to evacuate, just disheartening. Many of the AZ side evacuees have been able to return home; pretty much everyone except for the ones from the town the fire actually crossed. Most of that is just because of dangerous standing snags left after the fire. It's at 38% contained, so with the returning evacuees, I was starting to feel hopeful. But they warned us of high winds today and tomorrow and I guess they did create problems. I just want it over, but I chose to live in a wildfire area, and this is the second massive one in seven years, so I guess I just need to deal with the reality that we're going to have them, and this one is not likely to be out until monsoon comes. And then we'll have to deal with fire erosion related flooding.

I can't even imagine forking over air fare for a great-aunt's funeral. That is such a distant remove from me. It was a big deal for me to drive to Portland for my grandmother's funeral. (The only grandparent whose funeral I've attended.)

Though one thing you noted was key for my grandmother's death - she was the last person on that level of the family tree. With her passing it all fell down to my Dad and my Aunt Dot and there really was a sense of a generational shift. Especially since my Dad and Aunt Dot also passed within a decade so now it's down to my cousins.

Curiously when my grandmother died a bunch of stories came out which had been verboten before. Like, we're sitting around with my cousins and their kids and somebody pipes up about, "Yeah, what was up with that summer when we all got farmed out to our distant relatives?" and my Dad volunteers, "Oh yeah, that's when your dad (his brother) went AWOL during WWII and was put in the brig..."

That kind of stuff. My cousin Toni still doesn't know that she's named after the guy my Aunt Dot had an affair with while my Uncle was at sea.

{{Liese}} I'm sorry. That's a lot to deal with.

I can't even imagine forking over air fare for a great-aunt's funeral.

Well, we were really close. We were always in and out of her house every time we were in Hawaii, which was a lot of times, for months at a time. My "cousins" from that branch of the family although second removed or whatever, were my closest cousins when we were kids. We were always there or they were here. She came for my graduation, and my sister's wedding. (One of my regrets about eloping.)

My cousin Toni still doesn't know that she's named after the guy my Aunt Dot had an affair with while my Uncle was at sea.

! Is she more than named after him?

! Is she more than named after him?

Yeah, if she did the math and figured out when my Uncle was at sea she'd know. Two funny (by which I mean, "rather ironic") things: (1) she was my uncle's favorite; (2) she's really into geneology.

Everybody in the family knows except her.

Oh Liese, I'm so sorry.

Any chance you could get your Mom to go for someone else? For Sheldon's sake maybe? If he really needs her and all...

I'm sorry, Liese.

Thanks guys. I feel better about it this morning. I think it's unrealistic that any of us would go, but I think I can be okay with that. I'll try to get the cousins to get me in touch with Sheldon, because I definitely can relate to his struggle.

It's stormy! So we're skipping church this morning. I proposed we all go back to bed after breakfast, but no one seems to be doing that. Except me! Well, okay, I'm in the bedroom hanging out online, but still, lazy Father's day, yay!

I do wish I'd taken a bath yesterday afternoon when I was thinking about it, though.

Oh, Liese! What a mess of lousy choices!