I dunno, I envy many things about having a penis. Or, OK, mostly just one thing--peeing standing up.
Damn you, Bridget! Damn you to Hades! You broke my heart in a million pieces! You made me love you, and then you-- I SHAVED MY BEARD FOR YOU, DEVIL WOMAN!
Monty ,'Trash'
Natter 67: Overriding Vetoes
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, nail polish, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
meara - Mar 07, 2011 9:32:45 am PST #26729 of 30001
Liese S. - Mar 07, 2011 9:34:23 am PST #26730 of 30001
"Faded like the lilac, he thought."
I am standing here watching the trashcan rock back and forth. The truck is going around the cul de sac and I still think it`s going to tip before it gets here.
tommyrot - Mar 07, 2011 9:34:44 am PST #26731 of 30001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
Or, OK, mostly just one thing--peeing standing up.
That is pretty cool. As is the ability to put out small fires.
Connie Neil - Mar 07, 2011 9:35:28 am PST #26732 of 30001
brillig
Peeing standing up would rock. But getting it caught in zippers . . . I had a friend in college who was late for dinner once because he spent fifteen minutes knowing he was just going to have to yank the zipper back down real fast to free himself.
§ ita § - Mar 07, 2011 9:35:35 am PST #26733 of 30001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
You don't need a penis to pee standing up. It just makes not getting it down your leg easier.
t /pedant
Yeah, that tag, totally closes.
Doctor's office, call in the refill! Stop telling me you have, when you haven't!
Connie Neil - Mar 07, 2011 9:36:09 am PST #26734 of 30001
brillig
As is the ability to put out small fires.
Hubby the former fireman has tales to tell. Involving beer and small grass fires.
Tom Scola - Mar 07, 2011 9:36:59 am PST #26735 of 30001
Remember that the frontier of the Rebellion is everywhere. And even the smallest act of insurrection pushes our lines forward.
Writing your name in the snow!
§ ita § - Mar 07, 2011 9:37:29 am PST #26736 of 30001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
Writing your name in the snow!
Requires snow. Ergo fail.
meara - Mar 07, 2011 9:38:17 am PST #26737 of 30001
That is pretty cool. As is the ability to put out small fires.
OK, putting out fires did not really occur to me, it's not something I've ever needed. But not having to sit down on a gross toilet seat? Being able to camp in the woods so much more easily? Stuck in a traffic jam with no place to go, and able to handle that business? Yeah, I envy that.
t ETA: Yes, ita, I know many women who can pee standing up...but it's SOOOO much more likely to be messy. And still involves dropping your pants a fair bit
-t - Mar 07, 2011 9:43:37 am PST #26738 of 30001
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
That is why my great-great-grandmother always wore long skirts and no underwear, so she could easily squat in a field whenever she needed.
Yes, this is the lore that is passed down in my family.