I've considered getting Bartleby a dog of his own, but have very mixed feelings. We have such a good thing going on, I would hate to mess with the mix.

I got Percy because Leo had always had another cat around, and he seemed like he missed the companionship of another feline. Percy is the same age and gender, and was not a dominant personality, so I figured there wouldn't be problems. It's worked out okay, and I'm really glad I got Percy because he's thrived and I love him to pieces and my sister, who's never cared for pets, has fallen totally in love with him, but they aren't friends like I'd hoped they'd be. Mostly they ignore each other, sometimes they chase each other, sometimes Leo gets rid of his excess energy by playing rougher than Percy likes and Percy hides for a while. A couple times I've seen snuggling, and ear licks, and of course there's the sniffing, so they don't dislike each other, they just... aren't close, and I think Percy would really rather be an only cat and have me all to himself.

So, back to you... You'd probably have an easier time finding a dog he liked, since you can take him with you to meet the prospectives, but still, if you and Bartleby are happy with each other, I say stay with that.

I've considered getting Bartleby a dog of his own, but have very mixed feelings. We have such a good thing going on, I would hate to mess with the mix.

That reminds me of Dharma & Greg--Dharma would introduce one of her dogs and then introduce the other dog as his dog. Very cute.

It took me 18 months (to the day, weirdly) after Lucy. My coworker lost her dog around the same time and had a new puppy within weeks. I think when the time comes your instincts will guide you. There's no right or wrong here, and no way to know in advance.

smonster, I'm going to bet that Frankie had a 'moment' that created an uncomfortable memory for you. If you, semi-consciously, fear he will react negatively, he will sense that and do so. Even when you are SURE you aren't the stimulus.

The basic principle of helping your dog to be confident is to make sure that the entire world belongs to you, and comes TO him, THROUGH you. That means 'claiming' the stimulus as soon as you notice a potential negative response.

Step in front of him, bend forward a tiny bit and ask for a sit. Praise him for doing what you ask and do not let him break position until he is calm.

A really good friend told me recently that she is fearful of what will happen to me when Bartleby goes. She is not wrong to be concerned. She asked me specifically to get a second dog so that I will be forced to live for the new one. Helping Bartleby stay young would just be a useful side effect.

I get what you are saying, Zen, about things not necessarily working out as planned. I would definitely do gobs of temperament testing and socialization before making a decision.

I am acutely aware that there will never be another Bartleby. I would not want to be unfair to a new pooch...in a way I've seen SO many of clients be unfair because Dog A was perfect and Dog B is not Dog A. So, I know I must be careful. Who knows, maybe I'll be dog free from that point on. Or, Fate will bring me the right one, in the same way Bboy came to me.

Bonny, if and when it comes, I hope I can be of help to you. Lucy was the dog of a lifetime. She was there for some many of the transformative periods of my life, and quite literally saved my life, when I was buried in depression, and my sanity, when all the shit went down with my mom.

Darby looks a lot like her, which seriously weirded me out at first. I almost backed out on the adoption because it was so strange and I didn't want to be taking her in on false pretenses, as it were. But it felt like the thing to do - I liked her, and she needed the kind of home I could give, and how could I reject her based on being too much like the dog love of my life? I'm sure my family and friends all had raised eyebrows.

She's so completely different though that there's just not even any real connection in my mind. She's her own girl, and it didn't take long to see that. She may not have the impact that Lucy did (or she may), but she's carved her own place.

If a new dog now is what's good for you and Bartleby, do it. If not, I'm sure fate will step in at some point.

Lucy was the dog of a lifetime.

I just remembered I got to meet Lucy in Cleveland!

Bonny, if and when it comes, I hope I can be of help to you.

Oh, Brenda, that's lovely. Thank you. I will definitely reach out.

She was there for some many of the transformative periods of my life, and quite literally saved my life, when I was buried in depression

Same here, for real.

If not, I'm sure fate will step in at some point.

This is my prayer.

Lately, I've been dreaming about having a Mastiff named Pump Nineteen or a set of Rotties named Leto and Ganima.

I'm impressed with my imagination, but can't fathom having dogs that big.

I have to share for those who love the 24/7 urban decay eyeliner--I was on sephora.com looking for a Christmas present for my sister, and found this set--its almost all the colors in mini pencils, plus a full size black pencil. I think $40? I figured I needed a new black one anyway, and any colors I don't like I'll toss in with my sisters present. I'm so excited to test them out tomorrow!

Having deep thoughts, following yesterday's meeting with uni people, about such things as why they are so against me going part-time, and what their hidden agendas are. Can't decide what to do with their various options. Hmph. People.

The tumblr is cool! I shall try to post nice things there if I find them.

I like the doggie talk. We are considering getting one. Possibly a pug. I need to be sure that The Girl's going to be around enough to help me care for it, though, so not just yet. But, pug!

I'm really, really empathy-impaired. It's frustrating, because it really isn't something I can change, and I've managed to get to a point where I'm almost capable of it, but it is a constant effort, because my brain's not hardwired for it.

Can totally relate, from an autistic spectrum point-of-view. Reading body language is similarly difficult. I've almost had to learn both step by step. And I don't make eye contact. People just get to deal with my dreamy staring-into-the-distance communication style.

Safeway cashiers are forced to address customers by their first names and I hate it.

Ugh - horrible. I'm waiting for the day when I'm old enough to be considered a cranky old maid (in the old-fashioned, 'those two ladies who live together must be spinster sisters' way) and can insist on everyone calling me Ms J. I hate being referred to by my first name, by everyone. It's too familiar. It particularly rankles with doctors.

bonny, it's good that you've made decisions regarding your friend. I hope they're ones that you remain happy with.

Time-for-rest~ma, ChiKat.

Her -for all intends and purposes- stepdaughter is interning at the Old Globe. How cool is that?

That's so cool! What a great job.