it sounds like she started it.

Which, okay, I didn't actually know it would only be 5 minutes when I talked to her...but I didn't call her back when I finished it either.

Eh, I don't know that you are obligated to do that. I think that you're being too hard on yourself. It's fine if you don't want to get into the fact that you're annoyed with her behavior and are not in the mood to see her right now. You have a busy day, and history has shown that she may not even show up when she said she would!

Seriously, bonny- please cut yourself a break. You didn't do a bad thing.

Well, yeah.

But I should have been more direct.

eta:

You have a busy day, and history has shown that she may not even show up when she said she would!

Heh. That's a fact!

maybe. Ime, not everyone appreciates that.

But I should have been more direct.

You've been through a traumatic physical situation that you're just starting to really recover from... I think that you can put the discussion with your friend about how her behavior impacted you off to another time, when you are better equipped to deal with it.

You can be direct later. Don't beat yourself up for it today!

bonny, you do not in any way, shape, or form owe it to this person to spend energy on her at this time. You have already done enough - make no mistake about it, waiting around for someone does take energy, and when it is at a premium as it is for you now, that's nothing to sneeze at. You told the truth as you knew it, and now that you know differently, you are still allowed to choose how to spend the time and energy that are freed up by the knowledge. The choice that you are making is one that is good for your health and your business. Your bff has uniformly been less than rigorous in her communication herself, and doing so in a way that restricts your precious resources of time and energy. To regain your control of those resources is not the wrong thing to do.

I'm sorry her visit worked out this way. But clearly she has her priorities. And I do not think it is incumbent upon you to give up yours in favor of them.

bonny, you ARE booked in the sense that you have plans. You plan to marshal your energy/resources for your clients. You plan to use any "free time" not seeing clients to prepare for the next client -- and if that means recharging, that's certainly a part of preparation. Especially when you're still recovering.

What is being more forthright going to accomplish? She's behaved hurtfully (or thoughtlessly) and I guess you could see it as a "now you see what I felt like." That could be worth it to you, but I doubt it. Would it do anything more than make it more awkward the next time you do see her? I think a conversation or note later on saying you're sorry you didn't get to see her and next time can we make some more specific plans, because it was hard feeling like you kept getting bumped down the list for more important stuff, would accomplish the same thing without escalating.

And your down time, especially right now, is completely legitimate. As I believe you've advised some of us in the past.

Bonny - take care of yourself. Your friend was being thoughtless and careless with your time. You waited for her all weekend. You did not do a bad thing.

Sox, just try to appreciate the American Girl stuff for being age appropriate and let the extended family do the buying! Kalliope already has a Bitty-Baby from Sara using this approach.

trying.

cheerios: My 20 year old Singer just bit the dust, and will only stitch in one direction, with lots of begging. I did all the maintenance-y things and the oiling and took it apart and the repair shop is making noises like 'the old grey mare ain't quite what she used to be'. It has been repaired a lot before. Does this mean I can start looking at new ones? The shiny ones that do some (not all because WHOO) of the tricks?