I went with my relationship with Hubby with no plans, no expectations, I probably went about it completely the wrong way. Hell, I even married the first guy who asked me. It became utterly inconceivable to imagine living without each other around. Probably absolutely co-dependent and unhealthy, but hey, it's worked so far. As we tell people, we married each other so as to save two other perfectly blameless people the grief of being with us.

I mean, we've only been dating two months, and he just got out of a four-year relationship like, six months ago, and I've been trying to be patient and not push and give him his space (which he recognizes) but it just isn't fun to feel like I could be rejected at any moment. I can't grok being all logical and rational about whether you like someone and want to be with them.

This is actually very similar to how things progressed with me and Tim. FWIW. He was reboundy, and I knew that, and I think for at least the first 6 months he didn't really know if he wanted to be in a relationship. And then he did.

And that phase did suck in a lot of ways, because I also felt like whether the relationship continued was all up to him (and, I guess it was), and I didn't know if he would decide to walk away at any time.

The uncertainty fucking sucks. All I can say is that, for me, I was willing to risk the wait-and-see period.

As we tell people, we married each other so as to save two other perfectly blameless people the grief of being with us.

I told Tim last night that we should get married (1) so we could make our guests dance around a pig, and (2) so our friends could witness the way my mom "dances."

In my defense, #1 was because our friends who we were out with mentioned they were going to a Greek wedding where they were told they would have to dance around a pig. (Tim said it would have to be a tofu pig.) And #2 was because I was pretty drunk and trying to imitate the way my mom dances.

I don't think he's on board with either of those reasons. Killjoy.

{{{{smonster}}}} Just 'cuz.

{{{smonster}}}

I want to get in on this! {{{smonster}}}

{{{smonster}}}

I'm trying to decide what to make for dinner. I've got some okra and black-eyed peas to use up, and, since those aren't really "my" food and I have no idea what to do with them, I've been checking cookbooks. "Good Time Cookin' in Cajun Country" and "Vegan Soul Kitchen" seemed like the places to start, but I haven't found anything that totally looks right for today. "Cajun Country" gave me some smothered okra that looks OK, and "Vegan Soul Kitchen" had fried okra and black-eyed-pea fritters, but all of those require ingredients that I don't have and I don't feel like going shopping. I think I might just end up making some sort of stew with the okra and the beans and some canned tomatoes and spices. It's really good okra from the farmers market, though, so I feel like I should do something more with it.

I'm a big fan of okra tossed with a mixture of flour, cornmeal, s&p (the cornmeal is not essential, but it adds a nice crunch) and fried. It's a great way to enjoy fresh okra.

Of course, the idea of the stew sounds really tasty, too.

Does frying okra alleviate the slime?

Bummer. My favorite seafood joint burnt to the ground this morning. [link] It was a real colorful bar with lots of outside seating, girls in ridiculously skimpy outfits, and tasty food and drinks. They had one of those claw machines that you see in restaurants for stuffed animals over the lobster tank. For a $2 chance they would cook and serve you the lobster if you grabbed one. I will miss the joint bunches.