Well, it's for 12, but he said we could change it to 6. But I'm the only one with copies. Is there a website for tenants?

I get to have a baseline mammogram. Being 35 sucks.

As much as I despise the tit squishing, I can't help think it must be worse for women with small tits. How can you get a proper flattening in the scanner when there's not much to flatten?

And I think I missed mine last year. Yay, 50.

OMG. I must break in to flail about the most amazing stupid human trick I just witnessed.

In my neighborhood, it is pretty much all parallel parking.

Walking the little guy just now, I noticed a fellow (mid 20s), standing with the back of his knees in the middle of the front grill of a parked car.

A moment later, I realized that his late-life parents or grandparents were attempting to avoid bumping into the car behind them by backing up ONTO THE YOUNG MAN'S KNEES!

They were using him as a bumper.

I can imagine an insurance company replacing a dented bumper. Would his health insurance cover two new knees when he VOLUNTEERED to stand behind a car being parked by an old guy?

I'm glad I didn't shriek, but I HAD to comment.

His response..."No big deal."

I just wish I had a Darwin Award application on me.

Preserving my reputation among the family or just being a shithead? You decide today on our newest episode of "Aimee's Batshit Crazy Family"!

So I was just at the library and on my way downstairs to check out my finds (I found an awesome book on the history of Broadway Musical theater and a book about a year in the life of QE2). As I walked to the stairs, I looked to my right and there was my Crazy Uncle K! So I said, "Hi K! How are you?" He looked up and his mouth formed the word "Hi." but then saw it was me, drew his mouth up into a very good impersonation of a butthole, and turned away from me. I asked, "How are you doing?" in the most cheerful of voices. He walked away from me, shooing me with his hand, as though I were a distasteful insect.

I laughed to myself as I went down the stairs and checked out my books. I don't ever want to give him the opportunity to say to other family memebers that I am rude or ignore him when we run into each other.

I also say, kill 'em with kindness and fuck him if he can't take a joke.

or just being a shithead?

Uh, YOU were not the one being a shithead.

You go, Aimee. Well done.

I consider it a great testament to my personal fortitude that I did not buy cigarettes today, and that I am just now making myself a drink.

I was *this* close to telling him I'd be praying for him, but figured I'd pushed his buttons enough.

No kidding, Aims, you're kind of my hero right now for being that self-possessed.

I called my landlord and left a message.

I am going to do dishes, Moldovan style. Yay Peace Corps for teaching me extreme water conservation!

Also, St.W called to schedule more Firefly watching. We settled on Thursday.

Thanks, bebe. Sometimes, I really surprise myself.