Spike ,'Same Time, Same Place'
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Did he let her out of the agreement to stay local or just not file a suit?
A stipulation to not move anywhere is pretty rare in a custody arrangement and usually only done by mutual agreement with shared physical custody (50/50). Which is not the case here.
It's not at all common, because it could be used to control your ex-spouse who may want to remarry and relocate etc.
Erin, thanks for that magnificent rant. There's a similar situation going on with not-so-DXDiL, and it's making me crazy. Your justified anger and rational effective planning just make me more determined to be there as much as I can for the kids. And I send you all support thoughts and encouragement.
Yeah, David, D didn't want to be the asshole who had a bitter ex living her trapped rage near him. And MN was only a 7 hour car trip. PA from KC is more fraught, and expensive.
Ugh. I gotta go to bed -- work tomorrow.
Yeah, David, D didn't want to be the asshole who had a bitter ex living her trapped rage near him.
I don't think it was an option for him anyway. You can't fight it in court and win it. Judges won't put that stipulation in. If there isn't a mutual agreement by both parents, then the court will generally presume the majority of physical custody goes with the mother (usually something like 70/30). The father retains joint legal custody but that just means having a say in schooling, medical matters and religious practice.
Unless D and his ex both agreed to it and specifically agreed to it in the custody arrangement there's no way he would've gotten a stipulation requiring her to stay close.
And this just reflects the reality that most single parents are women and shouldn't be bound by fathers who have absented themselves and aren't helping to raise the kid.
Argh. Why is it Sunday night? It's not even like I anticipate a hugely rough Monday (though now that I've said that...). What can I do to make Monday fun and exciting or something? I had a really good day today, so what to do, what to do...I'm thinking "bright colors", though I'm not sure I have any in my wardrobe! :)
Erin, you are a fantastic stepmom. M is pretty fortunate to have a Dad who loves him so much and a stepmom who is looking out for him. Bless you for balancing out all the self-involvement and craxiness in his other home environment.
Erin , you are awesome. That is all.
Erin, I agree with everyone saying you're an incredibly good stepmom. I wish you and your stepson a relationship like the one I have with my dad's partner, where we hang out and talk academia and writing go for coffee and are great friends. I love that. I'm sure your stepson will increasingly feel the same way about you.
This week, apart from writing a (very overdue) book review for an academic journal, I am mostly making funding applications for next year. I would so appreciate some funding~ma. Buffista ~ma is a thing of wondrous awesomeness.
Erin, I echo those who are saying you are an excellent stepmom.
Seska, much funding~ma to you.
Yay, Tzepesh!