The other aspect of this that I find interesting is that it seems like the few men in predominantly female fields tend to do A LOT better than women in predominantly male fields. I have noticed that male librarians tend to be be in universities and in systems or management, all areas that tend to be more highly valued. Most of the male librarians I know are fantastic - of course, most librarians I know of either gender are fantastic - but I still find it interesting.

libkitty, I'm currently taking a class in Library Management, and we all keep telling the one male in our class that he'll probably go the furthest in the field just because of his gender. Not necessarily true, but statistically, it's pretty likely.

Oh, {{{libkitty}}}. And stay safe, WindSparrow.

Also, Hil, I'm sorry to hear that. And I blame Passover for every single argument this time of year.

My understanding is that after World War II in Russia, so many male doctors had been killed in the wars that there was a severe shortage, and the field became predominantly female, at which time respect and remuneration for doctors dropped drastically.

Russia was also one of the first places where women could practice medicine to begin with. According to my long line of doctors in the part of the family that immigrated (well, more like ran for their lives) from Russia to England during the 19th century and the beginning of the 20th, two of my long distance female relatives could be doctors in Russia, but not in England. Also, the news about the benefits of washing your hands before treating patients reached England about 20 years after Russians have heard of it.

Oops. I didn't mean to kill the thread with the Russians and hands washing talk.

My mother seems to think that she's going to be getting some grandchildren soon. Or maybe it's just wishful thinking. I told her that I'm volunteering in the cat wing at the local shelter, and her first response was that I can't work with cats if I'm pregnant. Whenever she visits my sister and notices the hundred years worth of paint peeling in a few corners of her apartment, she tells her that she's going to have to get that fixed before getting pregnant. Neither of us have given her any indication that we're planning on having a baby any time soon.

No thread killing, just weekend lull.

I came home last night. Still in bed today, working on computer. My son made me breakfast in bed so apparently I was missed. I wrote to my sister in NY and told her I really think she should come down and visit mom. I know she is really busy with work, but I think everyone will benefit from a visit.

I just don't know what is going to happen with mom. She doesn't have one big bad thing that can be fixed, or not. Her blood pressure and heart rate aren't what they should be, but they can be controlled with meds. Her values in a bunch of nutrients aren't what they should be, but that can be controlled to a certain degree. She has zero energy and is on oxygen, that can improve with physical therapy and work. She is old and things don't work the way they should without effort and intervention. It all depends on whether she is willing to do the hard work.

She is in a place where she feels she has lived a good life. She has outlived everyone she knew growing up. Her last childhood friend died last summer. She vastly outlived in number of years all her family. I'm afraid she is ready and none of us want that to be true, but it isn't our decision either.

black coffee:

Hey Hill, xpost because it took me a long time to write the above. Now are you sure you aren't planning to get pregnant? My MIL is like that. She has all grandsons and really would like a granddaughter. 3 of her 4 kids are done so the one remaining is getting a lot of pressure. Becky would like kids, but poor thing is doomed if she has sons because grandma has such a desire of a girl.

Many have argued that the level increased pay for specialists is out of line and is harming our health care system.

I will say that, as much as I *love* my primary-care doctor and do trust my life with him, I'm okay with him being paid less than the neurosurgeon who sliced open my back and removed things from my spine and put me back together in such a manner that I still worked properly.

But your specialist would probably have done just as good a job if he or she were paid only a lot more than your GP instead of shitloads more than your GP. (Can you tell I'm too lazy this morning to look up statistics?)

She is in a place where she feels she has lived a good life. She has outlived everyone she knew growing up. Her last childhood friend died last summer. She vastly outlived in number of years all her family. I'm afraid she is ready and none of us want that to be true, but it isn't our decision either.

Laura, this can be so hard for the ones who will be left behind.

I desperately wanted Niki to survive this last difficulty, but had to be okay with her going if that was what she chose. In the end, I'm glad she recovered, but the closeness of the thing gave me the opportunity to 'finish' what I needed to tell her and to do what I needed to do.

I wrote her a poem. She is BIG into homespun poetry...every birthday card I get from her includes some jaunty rhyme. I included all the things I love about our life together. She LOVED it...especially that it wasn't sad...and took it with her to California.

Now, I know that when the time comes, my heart will be a bit lighter because I won't have any regret. It also makes our conversations now lighter, because I've given up on my need being greater than hers.

In any case, I'm glad your mom is home and hope that she feels motivated to do what needs doing.

(Niki is sadly NOT motivated, so it's just a matter of time until the next crisis...but that has to be okay.)