Years ago I got a Futon couch. The salesman tried to talk me out of paying for assembly. "Why throw away $50 bucks" he said. I went ahead and paid for assembly, wondering why the salesman pushed so hard against an addition to the sale. The couch showed up with assembly specialists. The full sized couch was in bags that could litterally be carried in one hand (other than the futon itself. The assemblers dumped out what looked like hundreds of parts. And the two guys who were experienced enough not to have to glance at the instructions because they'd put so many of this model together took 2.5 hours of labor (with no pauses to rest) to put the thing to together. I can't imagine the nightmare of one klutzy person doing it with instructions badly translated from the Korean or whatever.

So definitely, get the stuff assembled from now on.

so many people have thoughts that they're just being tolerated

I also have that fear that no one really likes me and everyone's just tolerating me. But you know, it occurs to me that sometimes I myself am just tolerating the presence of someone I actually love very much. For example, my sister goes on and on and repeats herself over and over; I zone out and wish she would shut up. But my sister is a wonderful person, I enjoy her company, and I fear the day I might have to live without her. And I know her well enough to know why she does it, which helps a lot with the tolerating. Occasionally being annoyed by someone doesn't mean not loving them. *Everyone's* annoying in some way. And the longer I live alone, the more annoying I'm surely becoming...

Ellipses are annoying, right?

This coupled with feeling pretty invisible in the various fora in which I participate has got me about this close to a meltdown moment.

FWIW, I read everything you say, Spidra. You're not invisible. I totally feel for you; I was in a situation much like yours 15 years ago. If I were on the right coast, I'd offer you my spare bedroom for a respite.

Thanks, folks.

That's a good realization, Hil!

We're having a furniture moment here as my dad disassembled the cool Craftsman-style futon/bed I had in the old house and taped the parts in a drawer that goes under it. He also put the instructions there. But they're not there now (nearly 2 months later).

I can't shake the nagging feeling that I might have seen them in the pile of stuff post-move and thought that I'd save them from something by putting them in a "safer" less-exposed place. Only I can't remember for sure whether I did that and, if I did, where I put them. I think I may have to acknowledge that nature is greasing the skids towards Alzheimer's and I'd best not depend on my memory for important things anymore. I've started looking around in my room for those instructions just in case I happen to be the guilty party.

I'm still curious as to what "ita news" is but I may need to back-skim the thread...

I was supposed to go buy a table from craigslist today, but my GPS got confused by an address in a place that's not an incorporated town, and I couldn't figure out where to go. This is the third time that I've tried to buy this same table from this same person, and something always happens. (Well, last time what happened was that I just forgot.)

I know that a whole lot of my issues with assembling things is that, when I was a kid, the fact that I was able to put stuff together with minimal instructions and badly drawn diagrams that confused adults was frequently part of the "Look how smart she is!" stuff. I really need to remember that, for most of the bigger pieces, I was mostly directing my dad about what pieces went where, and I didn't need to do much of the heavy physical stuff.

I love assembling furniture, but I will pay someone else to avoid heavy lifting every time.

Is tonight the first night of Eid? The mosque next door is having some kind of major shindig. I don't mind except their roof deck is *right* outside Dylan's bedroom window, so I hope he can sleep through it!

Jessica, I seem to recall something to that effect. I read an article about a mosque that was considering canceling their festival because the nearest Saturday happened to fall on 9/11 this year.

Yeah - I thought it was 9, 10, 11 this year but maybe they're starting early because of 9/11.

I hate to be cranky about this because of the whole Ground Zero Mosque kerfuffle, but to be fair I'm equally cranky about the church on the other side of the building during loud Christian holidays! And the randomly loud neighbors behind us who as far as I know aren't hosting any kind of organized religion in their house.

Hey, as long as it's an equal opportunity cranky!

Googled for sliding scale psychotherapy in this area. First came the pleasant surprise that there was one place in So Pas that even does that. Second came the serious bummer that I'm screwed for being a single childless woman. It's a child & family specialty practice. I will try to console myself with the thought that at least I don't have to wrestle for childcare or get up early to take someone to school.

I'm screwed for being a single childless woman

Darn you for your practical approach to life events.

Honestly, people have said to me--not recently and not more than once--"If you had kids, you could get all sorts of help from the state." Yeah, like that's a reason to bring children into the world.

You're a child. You have a family. There ya go.