I hope you don't think that I just come over for the spells and everything. I mean, I really like just talking and hanging out with you and stuff.

Willow ,'First Date'


Spike's Bitches 46: Don't I get a cookie?  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


erikaj - Mar 15, 2011 3:44:33 pm PDT #17688 of 30000
Always Anti-fascist!

I think the social workers think I make you up. But I told you how they're idiots, right?


Strix - Mar 15, 2011 3:57:05 pm PDT #17689 of 30000
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

Aw, thanks, Scrappy.

No, erika, we are total delusional fantasies. Isn't your brain AWESOME?!


WindSparrow - Mar 15, 2011 3:59:21 pm PDT #17690 of 30000
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.

What if we are all the delusional fantasies of a mad scientist?


Trudy Booth - Mar 15, 2011 3:59:54 pm PDT #17691 of 30000
Greece's financial crisis threatens to take down all of Western civilization - a civilization they themselves founded. A rather tragic irony - which is something they also invented. - Jon Stewart

If I'm made up in your head, erika, why didn't you make me hotter?


Beverly - Mar 15, 2011 4:07:10 pm PDT #17692 of 30000
Days shrink and grow cold, sunlight through leaves is my song. Winter is long.

Maria, everyone's been so wise. I just want to offer hugs, and a single piece of practical advice. Whenever you can, relinquish the caretaker role. Let someone else be strong for the others, at least just for a little while. Give yourself permission to just--let go of the responsibility for others' wellbeing. Someone else--cousin, sister, son, will step forward to shoulder that need while you're off-duty. And it will be seamless.

Collectively, you support each other. Individually, you permit others the honor of supporting you.

And yes, this community is what saved me. Twice. Lean on us. We're here.


Strix - Mar 15, 2011 4:13:37 pm PDT #17693 of 30000
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

I agree. Buffistas have saved my sanity too many times for me to tell of it.


Barb - Mar 15, 2011 4:16:07 pm PDT #17694 of 30000
“Not dead yet!”

Collectively, you support each other. Individually, you permit others the honor of supporting you.

If I still cross-stitched, I'd totally put this on a sampler.

Given that it's the Buffistas, better, perhaps, to just have it embroidered on corsets.


sarameg - Mar 15, 2011 4:18:27 pm PDT #17695 of 30000

Maria, you are in my thoughts. I've been there far too recently, though I suspect I had more of an emotional remove. If you do need to run away for a bit, you know where I am. And I'll do my best you have that breathing space so that you can go home again.


Anne W. - Mar 15, 2011 4:19:36 pm PDT #17696 of 30000
The lost sheep grow teeth, forsake their lambs, and lie with the lions.

{{{{{Maria}}}}}}}

I wish I knew what else to say, other than I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts.


Calli - Mar 15, 2011 4:24:52 pm PDT #17697 of 30000
I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul—Calvin and Hobbs

I'm scared that if I can't bear this pain now and it's just my uncle, what's going to happen when it's my father, or mother, or sister, or husband? I will break, and I won't be able to put myself together again.

Several other, wise people said very smart things. I'll also add, in all seriousness, that sometimes drugs help, too. I got through my dad's last days and the following ceremonies and organization and whatnot with the help of friends, family, screaming into a pillow, and Xanax. While not everyone needs all of these, I think each can have a place. Drugs didn't stop me from feeling, but they helped me keep it together while I needed to do other things, and then fall apart in a safe, private place.

I am sorry about your uncle's prognosis.