I wear the cheese. It does not wear me.

Cheese Man ,'Chosen'


Spike's Bitches 46: Don't I get a cookie?  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


Liese S. - Mar 05, 2011 7:16:14 am PST #16797 of 30000
"Faded like the lilac, he thought."

That is super hard smonster, but you did the right thing. And it's not the breed's fault that many of them are in fact bred for fighting and aggression, but it's definitely possible that the one you picked up was. So you absolutely made the right decision, difficult as it was.

In other positive strangers doing for animals news, my neighborhood is so tiny we don't have a gas station, or any recognizable brand stores. What we do have is the Silver Creek General Store. And it is. You can buy vinegar in mass quantities, or bait, or tire chains. Pretty much any item you might actually need, they sell. At a premium for the convenience, but so worth it. We support them heartily. Without them, it's a half hour drive for anything.

Anyway, yesterday when I went (to pick up butter and cheese) they were in the midst of trapping and transporting cats. "What's all this?" I asked. "Oh," they said, "We love feral cats, but we don't love feral kitties." So they were trapping the four or five feral cats that live there, and transporting to the vet to be spayed and neutered. They were going to bring them back and release them, but they would no longer be generating more.

I was so pleased to see them acting responsibly beyond their obligations.


beekaytee - Mar 05, 2011 7:25:04 am PST #16798 of 30000
Compassionately intolerant

Was he trying to make his marriage fail?

The short answer is yes. Mostly because there is a story about marriage being chaotic and awful. The trick is to change the expectation. If he leaves the marriage, I want it to be because he has thought it through and made a rational choice. Blowing it up because he doesn't know how to NOT blow it up, isn't acceptable.


WindSparrow - Mar 05, 2011 7:34:01 am PST #16799 of 30000
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.

That's cool, Liese. Good on them.

IOmememeN, I would be money ahead to throw my tax refund at my 8.5% car loan, rather that at the hospital bills, for which I have already arranged a payment schedule and as far as I know carries no interest, wouldn't I?


WindSparrow - Mar 05, 2011 7:35:00 am PST #16800 of 30000
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.

If he leaves the marriage, I want it to be because he has thought it through and made a rational choice. Blowing it up because he doesn't know how to NOT blow it up, isn't acceptable.

I love that wisdom.


Seska (the Watcher-in-Training) - Mar 05, 2011 7:46:32 am PST #16801 of 30000
"We're all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh?"

Just doing a PhD and teaching.

Is that like pushing up daisies?

Actually, yes.

Love the story of the store-owners and the feral cats!


Steph L. - Mar 05, 2011 8:10:21 am PST #16802 of 30000
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine

Blowing it up because he doesn't know how to NOT blow it up, isn't acceptable.

It seems to me that there's a potentially good difference between NOT knowing how to not blow up his marriage, versus deliberately being an asshole with full knowledge that he could do otherwise.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, he doesn't sound like an easy client, but one who can potentially be helped. It's good he's come to you, bonny.


beekaytee - Mar 05, 2011 8:52:51 am PST #16803 of 30000
Compassionately intolerant

It seems to me that there's a potentially good difference between NOT knowing how to not blow up his marriage, versus deliberately being an asshole with full knowledge that he could do otherwise.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, he doesn't sound like an easy client, but one who can potentially be helped. It's good he's come to you, bonny.

What you say is true. In this case, I have total confidence that he isn't actually an asshole. He is a good guy who acts like an ass when he feels persecuted...which is too often.

I'm glad he is coming to me too. He came via referral by a fellow who had similar issues and is now 'cured.' So, I'm hopeful.


smonster - Mar 05, 2011 8:55:11 am PST #16804 of 30000
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.

I need to get over myself. I'm pretty stressed about all the stuff that needs to be done before the auction, and I asked a fellow organizer to do one thing for me yesterday, and she did not. And I have done the bulk of the solicitations for the silent auction, and I really need to get off my ass and go walk down the main drag hitting places up and dropping off fliers, and I'm feeling cranky and put upon.

I mean, this was my idea, and I haven't been as proactive about asking for help as I could be, but I wish I'd gotten a little more help in the solicitation department. Also, me being me, I really hate doing shit by myself and would like some company.

Whatever. I'm just venting. Need to get off ass and get dressed and get out the door, and it will all be fine.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Bitches thread.


WindSparrow - Mar 05, 2011 9:00:05 am PST #16805 of 30000
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.

{{smonster}} It sucks when people don't follow through on stuff.

Edited because those ::'s were meant to be hugs, and apparently I'm too sleep-deprived to get it right the first time.


beekaytee - Mar 05, 2011 9:06:20 am PST #16806 of 30000
Compassionately intolerant

::smonster:: It sucks when people don't follow through on stuff.

Totally this.