He did really cool stuff to get the nifty stuff, to her it's just nice looking shit she can sell.

It sounds like my mother's reaction when I wanted Daddy's class ring. It's heartbreaking when others don't understand that stuff has meaning other than monetary--or think that's the only value you put on something.

edit: In an interesting aside, I finally looked up the hallmark on one of the rings I found in Mother's jewelry box, and it turns out to be from a particularly collectible maker from the 20's and 30's. The ring is probably worth between $200-500. I wonder if she had any idea.

No, DJ, thats totally frustrating. That's something that should be discussed within the family.

erika, don't sweat it. We all have moments of self-pity, and if we only showed our best selves on here, then what would be the point? And sometimes it is the small everyday stuff that gets to you rather than the heavier loads that we shoulder, who knows why? And random things/shows just trigger sometimes, and it sucks. I'm sorry. Also, you're a Buffista: your hair is awesome. Comes with the territory.

smonster, I wish I had some awesome advice to give you, but it sounds like the system isn't really set up for success. Like you were saying, the rewards and consequences they have set up don't really work, at least not for most of them. What you need, like you've said in the past, is for them to have a set of graduates from the program working alongside them, so that they can see people like them who have come through the program successfully, and see them doing the work, or at the very least have a construction crew on-site, so that they can see how a fully functional crew works. Until the higher-ups get that, they are going to have limited success rates at best, and it's got nothing to do with any failing on your part.

Still thinking about and vibing hard for Andi and DCJ.

About the cultural thing: be willing to be a honky who doesn`t get it. Kids can see through you anyway, so be the honest you you already are. Admit when you don`t understand things.Express when you are having trouble communicating. We`ve been in the cultural field where we work (and lived) for over a decade and we barely understand. But the kids respond to us because we try to come in with respect and humility. You have access to resources and experience that they don`t. It`s that you`re trying to share, not the cultural stuff. You don`t have to be them for them to relate to you. And they don`t have to like you for the experience to be successful.

I agree with Liese. I think my most memorable teaching successes came out of being different from my students, not trying to be similar to them. Kids like sincerity.

I don't act like a teen or even underratand them all the time, but I think that is why I donwel wig them. Are there things like preferred jobs or tAsks that they can earn, smonster?

I'm not fixing the stuff my phone put up there

that is why I donwel wig them.

I don't know what it means to "donwel wig" someone, but I bet you do it well.

Actually, I think posting my best self keeps me in touch with her/it, but I can't always do that.

ah, I see. I think that you all need to work some carrots into your system.

You know, I've been thinking that, too. I had stopped doing the behavior mod charts, and maybe I shouldn't have. There aren't any other rewards or privileges built in, but maybe there need to be. Hmm.

Liese, thank you so much for those words. I try my best to be honest and not force connections, to be honest about who I am. Listening to them talk amongst themselves is really valuable, because they tend to share more that way than in direct conversation with me.

amyth, I talked about that just yesterday in an update meeting with the higher-ups, and I think they heard me. There is one graduate working with us now, and that's helpful, but sometime he gets a little talky meat.

Everyone, really, thank you. Y'all are my sanity and touchstone, my sounding board and my voice of reason.

Today could really be over now, but I still have a client to see this evening.

I spent some time with the lawyer going over options. It did not go as I would have chosen, but the attorney is a super nice guy. Perhaps even a little too nice. Still, it's nice to have him on my side.

I made a bunch of phone calls to finance offices and, while proactive and good, it was pretty stressful. (my eye is twitching, which is a really bad sign)

Then, I went to my hairdresser to prepare for doing some video shooting tomorrow evening. She cut my ear and it hurts like crazy and THEN, she chopped off my bangs to Mia Farrow with Frank Sinatra length and I am so. incredibly. unhappy. What the ever loving WHAT!?!

She's cut my hair perfectly, every time but not on the day when I really needed it.

I'm so, incredibly tired and cranky and feh. Hair grows, things will get done and I can put off the video shoot but I really want to yell.

Feh.

t /whining