I think that you can, you should try to avoid platitudes. You can say "I'm sorry, is there anything I can do?" pretty inoffensively, I think.

ION, JZ took Matilda with her to pick up her Dad at the airport tonight. First thing Matilda told her Papou?

"I'm going to a new school and my new teacher's name is Helen."

So far so good.

Good. Glad to hear it. I have high hopes for Matilda`s new school.
 
I am pretty sure I said, "I don`t know how you do it." to you & K, Kat. Oops. I say it to pretty much every parent, but yeah, I can see how there`s not really a good answer to that no matter how it`s intended. So, I apologize.
 
The SO & I saw a cutiepants Asian family in the Japanese garden at the Albuquerque botanical gardens this weekend and I was teasing him about deciding not to have kids. They had two little girls with adorable matching (not identical, mind you, complementary) hats. Of course if I actually had kids, we would never manage to get them out of the house to awesome outings like the botanical gardens, much less in complementary outfits.

I can tell you lots of parents just don't. I know, since I am the daughter of a runaway mother. My grandfather adopted me because she just couldn't get her shit together to parent a child (she had already given up a son for adoption 5 years before I was born). So, yeah, some people do put more effort into being a parent than others. It's effort, it's sacrifice, it's lots of things to be a good parent. And sometimes those of us who aren't parents (and those who are!) want you peeps with extra hard situations to know that we admire you and thank you. I hope that does not sound condescending or patronizing.

I had a really, really shitty "parent" so I am especially thrilled to see that others take parenting very seriously and do it well.

Not in my situation. And most likely not in msbelle's either. And not really in yours either.

What javachik said. By no means do all parents stick around. And some that do are horrible horrible selfish people. You're not. msbelle's not. I might be.

Oh, look, I'm awake.

Oh, look, I'm awake.

Me too, which is really incredibly stupid.

Me three, but then I'm supposed to be at this point.

So, yeah, some people do put more effort into being a parent than others. It's effort, it's sacrifice, it's lots of things to be a good parent. And sometimes those of us who aren't parents (and those who are!) want you peeps with extra hard situations to know that we admire you and thank you. I hope that does not sound condescending or patronizing.

Also, yeah, what javachik said.

Maybe instead if "I don't know how you do it" we could develop an alternative like, "I respect and honor your hard work in this difficult situation." And, you know, spread it to the masses.

I think "I don't know how you do it" fit because it's honest. And really, until you actually do it, you don't know how you do it. Sometimes while you're doing it, you don't know how you do it.

I like "I respect the job you're doing as a parent," too.

I need to hit up some places for sponsorship for our roller derby fundraiser coming up this month. It's being held in a bar, so I can't go to other bars or restaurants. But I'm going to see the tattoo parlors, the record store and a few chiropractors in town. Can't think of any other ideas.

I think that you can, you should try to avoid platitudes. You can say "I'm sorry, is there anything I can do?" pretty inoffensively, I think.

I think this. Or even less, I'm sorry and more, you seem overwhelmed.

Moreover, I generally know based on the context whether or not the person saying "I couldn't do it!" intends to be sympathetic in a way that I can dig. So when you, liese, and your DH came to visit us, if you did say it, I kinda could figure out what you meant. And I remember saying, "You could do it. You really have little choice."

Cashmere, what about coffee shops? Too bar like? Do you have a skating (and I mean skate board rather than roller skate) kind of shop? Actual alcohol brands? Tecate sponsors the LA Derby Dolls (as does Stila cosmetics!)