But you're very charming. Capture with charm!

Oh, go on. I promise that you will come to no harm at the hands of my clone.

I have recently been made aware that a former best friend tried out for a reality show where prize was a trip to the moon on s Russian rocket. She didn't win. It was also a bogus reality show. All time I was going to school with John Rogers and Colin Ferguson I was going to school with this flake. In fact, she was tight with John--they were in Physics together. However have we gone in such different directions, and hers TO THE FAKE RUSSKY MOON???

What the hell was she thinking? Then she said that was okay, because the reality show her friend got into -- boys who love boys and girls who love them -- was an epic clusterfuck. Really? Couldn't see that coming?

But the first friend has spent much of her free time in the past 20 years trying to get into space. And, uh, failing. She's done Mars Camp in Arizona, and went to the Antarctic to pretend to be on Mars. NASA turned her down. Does Canada have a space program? They certainly said no. If they have a British one, she asked. Nope.

I told her about Lori and she was very "oh, whatever." BEEYOTCH, Her handiwork stalks the red planet even this day. Bow down before her, wannabee,

It's possible K and I have issues, and that I am having beer with ice cream.

Oh, go on. I promise that you will come to no harm at the hands of my clone.

How gullible do I look?

... wait, don't answer that.

You are mighty cavilier about this experimenting with potentially lethal force when you're not here. IJS.

Distance makes me bold.

Explains a lot of my romantic life, actually.

How gullible do I look?

You look skeeeeerrry and fierce. Swears.

You look skeeeeerrry and fierce. Swears.

The StuntHusband laughed at that. Somehow, I don't believe you.

Now up to the Chisellers. The beaver hole investigation is fascinating as ever. He's onto the mole rats now. One of the benefits of being back at uni is that I can access the databases of academic papers, and it's not limited to my field of study. Here are some fun facts I've picked up from searching for papers on naked mole rats:

• Naked mole rats have two genes that act to inhibit cell growth. Humans only have one. The result: naked mole rats never get cancer.

• Naked mole rats are the longest-lived rodents in the world, living up to 28 years or so. Their life in colonies underground is particularly well-protected - they barely need to make contact with the above-ground world at all.

• A naked mole rat's somatosensory cortex (the part of the brain devoted to its senses), devotes nearly a third of its capacity to its front teeth alone.

• They do not feel pain from acid or from capsaicin.

A world of awesome right there, my friends.

Naked Mole Rat Man would make an excellent Batman villain.

Gnomes, mole rats, boobs, and clones. Good morning!

Naked Mole Rat Man would make an excellent Batman villain.

I think a Spiderman villain myself. He seems to attract more animal-themed baddies.

Of course, this villain should be a woman. It's the females that get all the cool pheromone-based powers. Oh! And apparently the act of giving birth sets off changes in the body that causes her vertebrae to lengthen. That's got to come in handy somehow.

And nail polish! Speaking of which, Smonster, you haven't moved recently, have you?