I've gotten to where I will pull off at a rest area, lock the doors, and nap for about 20-30 minutes.

Even exhausted I have a hard time napping on demand. But I'll just wait for some sleep or some actual alertness before I get back on the road.

Except recently driving home from Seattle. I got suddenly tired so I pulled off. I parked on the very edge of the rest stop, put a podcast on instead of my audiobook, tipped back my seat and turned the car off. Realized when I woke up twenty minutes later that turning my car off? Unlocks my door. Kids, this is why tired = stupid. But I felt way better for the rest of my drive home and thankfully was not murderized at a rest stop.

Megan's important realization

This is a key finding. If you flee, stay fled.

Other things I learned:
--plaid is not red, but it doesn't matter anyway
--don't mess with a neighborhood construction guy who views a park as his own personal world
--put another person's name on your keychain, preferably another race/ethnicity than your own
--when an officer asks if you've have anything to drink that morning, don't say "a few beers"

Cass, we're glad you weren't murderized, too. Good grief, woman.

Flee, stay fled. Check.

Y'all I have to be up in 6 hours. Sleep is being an illusive bitch tonight.

If you flee, stay fled.

Unless you're on an episode of Law and Order, because then you'll get arrested again by the same cop 20 years later and they'll find some way to charge you with a hundred different crimes.

Unless you're on an episode of Law and Order, because then you'll get arrested again by the same cop 20 years later and they'll find some way to charge you with a hundred different crimes.

Exactly. Or you'll flee to another country, and there will be crazy extradition plans, and they'll find out something even WORSE about you, etc, etc.

Oh, Rule #7 is avoid being on any Law & Order.

Cass, we're glad you weren't murderized, too. Good grief, woman.

Barring a couple of highly publicized serial killers, it's a pretty safe area to fall asleep at rest stop. I just was seriously startled when I realized - upon waking - that I'd carefully gotten away from the crowd and then slept in an unlocked car... Oopsie? I was, it should be said, totally refreshed by that nap and a totally safe driver all of the way back to Oregon.

My parents usually decided to just shrug and have my mom drive, rather than try to explain the difference between "had a drink" and "drunk" to elementary school kids.

Do you think they could go explain it to my mom?

Signed, I top 200 lbs, I'm forty years old, yes I can have a glass of wine with dinner.

That's a damn lie, by the way, I'm still 39.

But I am really looking forward to sentences staring with, "Mother, I'm FORTY YEARS OLD...".

I was thrilled when I turned 30, because I figured any lectures my mother chose to deliver were because of her issues, because I was 30, dammit, and that meant I was a grown-up (for purposes of not having to listen to maternal lectures).