Huh.

I'm always surprised when I realizes some like me for me. Not because i am unlikable, but because I barely opened my mouth for the first 18 years of my life. And even though there are a bunch of people that find me aggressive now ( not in a negative way , but baby doesn't sit in the corner much any more ) I still am surpirsed that people notice me.

And I have to say , most of the time in the work world, I don't really care if people like me. I also work with the public. So I have a professional skin that is a bit different than when I did the office thing.

We have one female developer on our team. I've been told not to make her angry, that she made the last person in my position cry, that she is rude, etc.

You know what? We get on just fine. She's direct, and I respond directly. She tells me what's wrong with a thing, and I get on and fix it. We joke around all the time. She's not rude, she's just not being a 'girl.'

I have a weird phobia about calling people by their names. Most of it is because I don't *remember* their name, but it seems so presumptuous somehow to say "Hi, Mike" or whatever.

There are people I've worked with for years and with whom I've had conversations whose names I don't know. I have a pool of about six names to work with, but I don't know who is who. People who use names all the time in conversations make me twitchy. And it also makes me twitchy that so many people who I don't know know who I am.

Sometimes I just twitch a lot.

*twitch*

I gotta come down on the side of saying I'm fine or saying hello if someone meets my eye. I think of those kind of greetings as a dog wagging its tail--not really giving information other than "I see you. You see me. No harm is meant." Dogs need it and I think people do too. Giving a greeting and not getting one back can feel like a rejection, because I think that doggie part of our brain still expects it.

It's a habit you have to get into and it feels odd at first, but once you get used to it, it makes moving through the world a little easier. I don't getting all up in someone's bidness or letting them get in yours--which is rude--I just mean the tiniest recognition, like a nod or some lame comment about the weather. I also try to always mention when I see something cool or pretty on a stranger--like telling someone on an elevator that they have awesome shoes. I like it when I get a sincere, unsolicited compliment, so I figure they will too.

I called into a meeting today that I've never taken part in before. The woman leading the meeting has never met me. She called me "Eva." I didn't correct her--I couldn't be arsed. A bunch of people chimed in and corrected her. I don't even know who they all are.

Go team name power!

I'm very particular about using names, but I'm very particular about establishing relationships with co-workers. I consider it very important for maximum productivity.

People to whom I've not been introduced need not to use my name. This is especially important for supermarket clerks reading it off my credit card. I hates that, I does. My name is something that's extended, not something that's taken.

Plus you're going to mispronounce my first name, or call me Mrs or something. I know you will.

People to whom I've not been introduced need not to use my name. This is especially important for supermarket clerks reading it off my credit card. I hates that, I does. My name is something that's extended, not something that's taken.

THIS THIS THIS THIS.

(and also, did I ever mention how fantastic it was to finally meet you, Kat, and Burrell?)

I try to keep my work circle tight because I have to be careful to make sure coworkers know exactly what it is I do, otherwise they mostly think that I'm in charge of The Internet, and that my boss rules it.

Which leads to requests like, "We want to promote store events on the site. What do you suggest?"

Uh. Not our jobs. Tell us what you want up, we'll get the creative done or give you specs and make sure it gets up, but we're not doing your jobs for you.

If they think they "know" me? It's nothing but people thinking they can get me to do their jobs.

It was great meeting you too, javachik!

My name is something that's extended, not something that's taken.

I particularly feel this with regard to first names. I hate it when people I don't know use my first name.

Froot Loops:

If they think they "know" me? It's nothing but people thinking they can get me to do their jobs.

Luckily my job is pretty well defined and I don't have to worry about that. The loosest part of it is that I function as therapy for the business group. They get to vent all their frustration about their current system to me, and I just need to make sure their future is better than their past. It's great bonding material, I just need to hold solid with their trust. I've done a pretty good job so far, but connecting individually is key to that. Everyone needs to feel listened to.