Oh, she finally left a voicemail. "I don't know how many messages you have but you have not returned my calls. I need to talk to you. Please call me back."

Beat.

"I love you."

I was wondering when she would play the love card. Now if I don't call her back, I clearly don't love her.

I wonder if her insistence is because it's Thursday.

It is. I'm supposed to start wearing it on a Thursday.

Happy birthday, MM!

You could tell her that you tried to call her back, but your bad Thursday juju prevented it?

I was just listening to Elizabeth Gilbert talk about her new book ("Committed") and talk about how Americans are abnormal because we have these fantasy expectations about marriage and Twu Wuv and all, and that the rest of the world is more pragmatic and views it as basically something for the financial security of the families and the stability of the community.

This triggered a ton of discussion points in my head, but it also seemed like something that might be relevant here.

Happy Birthday, Man of Miracles!!

I have the following meet-cute scenario in my head for P-C:

P-C gives in and wears the stupid amulet, which is bound to be smaller than an albatross, under his shirt. One day in a bookstore, he reaches for a graphic novel and the amulet swings out from under his shirt. Sitting on the floor reading graphic novels is an attractive girl with pink hair. P-C had noticed her earlier because of the Firefly-themed tattoos on her arms. She asks about the amulet, and P-C reluctantly tells her what it is. She says, "Oh, my god! My grandmother makes me wear this against the evil eye" and pulls an amulet out of her shirt.

She says, "Oh, my god! My grandmother makes me wear this against the evil eye" and pulls an amulet out of her shirt.

...then it turns out she's Gujarati and has six brothers.

Oh honey. But you will have Vortex (who totally needs the Dick-Weed polish) to keep you strong and entertain you.

I'm very much looking forward to some quality Vortex time.

ION, some people impulse-buy nail polish, I buy toy food for my new doll. But tiny cupcakes! And cake stands! And champagne flutes!

Can't wait to see peektures!

Speaking of impulse-buying nail polish, I totally bought two bottles of No Miss on sale tonight. Blue and green.

...also she has an interest in swordplay, dictionaries and steampunk jewelry, so your grandmother will never, ever be able to buy her anything she really likes, but that's okay cause you'll be busy living happily ever after.

Also, Vortex should totally buy the nail polish and call it Planning the Spring Wardrobe.

And JZ's stooopid cow-orker has her own cooties for sure, that's what she's smelling.

I prpobly missed summat I was gonna say, but heck. I can only edit this post so much.

ooooh! I totally remembered: It was: HAPPY BDAY MM!

Plus I was at Costco the other day and thought of fair Juliana because two laughing, bratty little girls came wheeling along on a flat bed cart and the bold one said "Scuse me! Is it possible to break your face?"

I was so thrilled that I actually knew the answer to that I went ahead and said that if you broke your nose, your cheekbone and your jaw, you definitely broke your face.

I think they were a little awed that I knew something that gory right off the bat.