There already is? I knew that was a good idea! Ah, well, not first again. But at least people agree with me on it...that's something.

I'm through with this whole marriage thing entirely

Hey, isn't there are monkish tradition in Indian culture? Tell her you're starting to think saffron robes are pretty spiffy.

No, that's Buddhist, I think. Darn my lack of keeping up with religions.

I've just had it. I am so very close to telling her that I'm through with this whole marriage thing entirely, and I don't want to hear about it ever again.

I suggest this. Possily in an email telling her that mentioning trigger words such as "wife" or "marriage" in any phone call to you will result in an immediate hangup. Such emails will be deleted and not answered.

I am so very close to telling her that if she doesn't shut up, I will start drinking and doing drugs and cutting myself and anything else I can do to destroy my life so she can't do it for me.

Not recommended. But an understandable impulse given your level of frustration.

Of course, this is a total "do as I say, not as I do" moment, coming from me. I'm leaving the state to break up with someone via email.

Hey, isn't there are monkish tradition in Indian culture? Tell her you're starting to think saffron robes are pretty spiffy.

No, that's Buddhist, I think. Darn my lack of keeping up with religions.

Siddhartha Gautama was from India. I don't know what colour his clothes were.

erika, I was joking ... although there might well be such an app. There IS one that makes a farting noise - good enough?

P-C, you have other options. You could always inform your mother that you're seeing somebody who turns out to be Completely Inappropriate. Potential double benefits -- get her off your back about marrying right away, and if/when you find somebody who's right for you, you can always point out that she's better than Completely Inappropriate Person.

Well, if there isn't, they need one. My brother would like the fart noise too much, I think.

Not recommended. But an understandable impulse given your level of frustration.

Well, I wouldn't actually do those things (...probably), but I thought I should be able to harness the power of the guilt trip as well.

Of course, this is a total "do as I say, not as I do" moment, coming from me. I'm leaving the state to break up with someone via email.

Oh dear.

Well, I've tried in person (twice), over the phone (once or twice), and via email once. Bad combo of his persuasiveness and my easily persuadedness.

Hey, once I left the country to break up with someone. And made it final(ish) via a minicassette. And *still* had to turn down a half-joking wedding proposal in person two years later.

Boy, can I pick 'em.

So what does this magic necklace do again?